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Asystole to break up....Final show

[views:50713][posts:242]
[show listing]  ____________________________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 9:33am - menstrual_sweatpants_disco ""]
You should do stand up.
 ________________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 9:41am - RTTP_SWAT_TEAM ""]
LOOK WHAT TEH DETECTIVEZ FOUND! LULZ!

http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/muc/375152841.html

"This is a very unique night for us in more ways than one because we will be having guest drummer Eric Peoples from the Boston band HALOBURN filling in on drums for us.

Eric is coming in clutch for us learning 8 ASYSTOLE tunes in 7 days and without his hard work ethic and determination to help us out, this farewell show wouldn't be happening."
 _________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 9:42am - c.dead  ""]
"My new band, DIASTOLE, is going to flush your band down the toilet with our new jam, "120/80" "

HAhaha, that was good, 120/80, hahaha. Just noticed that. I love this thread, hours of amusement here.
 ___________________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 9:45am - FuckIsMySignature ""]
i am VERY suprised that Ms Andersen Mar has nothing to do with this. i mean what the fuck... these guys clearly take up at least 11% of the music scene.
 _________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 9:47am - c.dead  ""]
"We'll also be signing posters and stuff by the merch table the whole night, so make sure you stop by and take a piece of us home with you. "

AHAHAHAHA, a band signing too? These guys are really know how to give back to the fans man.


It just gets better and better.

 _____________________________
[Jul 19,2007 9:54am - mOe ""]
blue said:i remember when this band was a nu metal band called mr ect. even better name. good thing you guys jumped onto the metalcore bandwagon, you guys wouldve looked like losers if were still doing nu metal after 2005.


THAT'S Mr. Ect!?!?!?
GHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
 _________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 10:14am - xmikex ""]
I took a look at their Myspace. I scanned it for a few seconds until I found something that satisfied all my theories that this band was a shitty waste of time.

ASYSTOLE writeup in Nov. Issue of Northeast Performer Magazine!

Only poser 30 something year olds that hang out around practice spaces and check out little kids' asses ever give a shit about what goes into Northeast Performer. Only poser bands that get excited over playing sports bars, and pay to play battle of the bands shows would ever give a shit about being talked about in a free magazine that's good for nothing but soaking up cum stains on the floor of a practice space.

You know what I'm talking about? That group of guys that always seem to be hanging around the studio no matter when you're there. They think they have some huge fanbase because they have a regular gig going at Waterworks or some dudeguy bar that people only goto for dollar chickenwings. They'll always try to sell you on their band and tell you "It's way heavier than that WAAF shit." like that's how I gauge my music: in relation to what Opie & Anthony or whoever, think is cool. And one of them always has like a fishing hat on...and a soul patch... and it's all because he's going bald......and they want to tell you stories about the rock star life and all these fairytales about girls they've done......and even though they brag about having huge exposure, and a massive fanbase, and all these gigs they always seem blown away when they find out you're playing a show out of state, or a show at a real venue.

Ya know???

And even though they're playing music that's aimed at teenagers no one under the age of 27 has ever seen them play. And they always have some super glossy looking logo that the bass player made because he goes to night classes on graphic design at a community college. And they always get excited about playing Bills Bar even though there hasn't been a real show at Bill's bar since like 2003. And they always have shitty equipment and Crate amps that most people out grow by the time they're 18, but with a dozen effects pedals and envelope filters and a wah pedal that they don't even use.

Ya know??

AND THEY ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS, HAVE GIRLS TANK TOPS!!!!

Nah mean?
 ________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 10:28am - slow  ""]
That was so well put! I’m gunna command c / command v that one for my archives.
 _______________________________
[Jul 19,2007 10:35am - Yeti ""]
xmikex for president!
 _________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 10:43am - xmikex ""]
xmikex for a nap.
 ________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 10:45am - slow  ""]
xmikex for a good xtimex
 _______________________________
[Jul 19,2007 10:46am - Yeti ""]
YouAreALeBangle (11:16:27 PM): I'll drown you in Faygo
YouAreALeBangle (11:16:37 PM): organge faygo...it will sting
YouAreALeBangle (11:17:06 PM): but it will also taste good
YouAreALeBangle (11:17:17 PM): anyways I'm an ex-juggalo
Xedora (11:17:34 PM): What haoppened to juggalos 4 lyfe?
YouAreALeBangle (11:17:43 PM): I was kicked out
YouAreALeBangle (11:17:49 PM): :'(
YouAreALeBangle (11:18:08 PM): saddest day of my life actully

i cant believe i just read that. i feel so dirty now.
 ______________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 11:46am - detazathoth ""]
this band pwns
 ____________________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 11:50am - FuckIsMySignature ""]
i'm holding this band directly responsible for my constipation.
 ______________________________
[Jul 19,2007 12:05pm - Cav ""]
xmikex said:I took a look at their Myspace. I scanned it for a few seconds until I found something that satisfied all my theories that this band was a shitty waste of time.

ASYSTOLE writeup in Nov. Issue of Northeast Performer Magazine!

Only poser 30 something year olds that hang out around practice spaces and check out little kids' asses ever give a shit about what goes into Northeast Performer. Only poser bands that get excited over playing sports bars, and pay to play battle of the bands shows would ever give a shit about being talked about in a free magazine that's good for nothing but soaking up cum stains on the floor of a practice space.

You know what I'm talking about? That group of guys that always seem to be hanging around the studio no matter when you're there. They think they have some huge fanbase because they have a regular gig going at Waterworks or some dudeguy bar that people only goto for dollar chickenwings. They'll always try to sell you on their band and tell you "It's way heavier than that WAAF shit." like that's how I gauge my music: in relation to what Opie & Anthony or whoever, think is cool. And one of them always has like a fishing hat on...and a soul patch... and it's all because he's going bald......and they want to tell you stories about the rock star life and all these fairytales about girls they've done......and even though they brag about having huge exposure, and a massive fanbase, and all these gigs they always seem blown away when they find out you're playing a show out of state, or a show at a real venue.

Ya know???

And even though they're playing music that's aimed at teenagers no one under the age of 27 has ever seen them play. And they always have some super glossy looking logo that the bass player made because he goes to night classes on graphic design at a community college. And they always get excited about playing Bills Bar even though there hasn't been a real show at Bill's bar since like 2003. And they always have shitty equipment and Crate amps that most people out grow by the time they're 18, but with a dozen effects pedals and envelope filters and a wah pedal that they don't even use.

Ya know??

AND THEY ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS, HAVE GIRLS TANK TOPS!!!!

Nah mean?



HAHA!
 ______________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 12:15pm - detazathoth ""]
so wait...why are the done if this guy is saying he's going to be so successful?
 _________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 12:24pm - xmikex ""]
Exactly, if this band had so much going for them then why are they over with? If this band had so much buzz, and exposure then why don't they have any label support? If there's such a demand for their music then where's the tours, the distros, the recognition?

Bands like this make you feel like you're taking crazy pills.
 ______________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 12:36pm - detazathoth ""]
stop making my brain hurtzzzz so muczz
 ___________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 12:45pm - brian_dc ""]
mike...I'm saving your first post on my computer forever.
 ________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 12:48pm - slow  ""]
here's how he put it...

"whatevr keep listening to gay bands like job for a cowboy. nobody likes that ultra brutal extreme crap"

this may at first look kinda dumb, but I see brilliance! seeing as Job For A Cowboy are successful, and that's what he's comparing RTTP bands to, I believe the young man sees our "ultra brutal extreme crap" peaking in popularity.

the "nobody" that he refers to not liking RTTP music is in his ability to "read the scene".

He correctly predicted the nu-metal scene's mighty rise with Mr ETC and bailed right when nu-metal’s popularity sank.

He then guessed right again with Asstole predicting Metalcore’s increasing popularity. That’s why Jagermiester sponsored them!

Now he’s predicting metalcore failing that’s why Asstole is breaking up. And he came here to simply give us a heads up that nobody is going to like our gay RTTP brutal crap soon.

Why don’t we listen to the words of this seasoned pro? He’s got his ear to the ground, he knows the underground. If everyone is nice maybe he can help all the bands on here become as successful as his!
 _________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 12:49pm - xmikex ""]
haha, well I'm glad people enjoyed it.
 ___________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 12:53pm - Niccolai ""]
xmikex said: And they always have shitty equipment and Crate amps that most people out grow by the time they're 18


:moe:
 ___________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 12:58pm - brian_dc ""]
I knew you'd chime in on the Crate dig.
 __________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 1:00pm - Niccolai ""]
HAHAHA


They are TONE MONSTERS I tell you!
 ________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 1:22pm - xmikex ""]
Niccolai said:HAHAHA


They are TONE MONSTERS I tell you!



You know what I'm talking about.
 _________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 2:11pm - c.dead  ""]
I think this is the most exposure this band ever got! They should be thanking us, yeesh.

Come to think of it, i think i saw their nu-metalesque sticker at my practice space building somewhere. Hmmmm....
 _______________________________
[Jul 19,2007 2:18pm - slow  ""]
does the sticker have a lot of drop shadow, lens flare, plastic wrap and backward letters accented by tribal decorations?
 ___________________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 2:37pm - FuckIsMySignature ""]
Crates fall apart after 2 years... at least mine did
 _________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 3:16pm - c.dead  ""]
"does the sticker have a lot of drop shadow, lens flare, plastic wrap and backward letters accented by tribal decorations? "


hahahaha, very accurate depiction. No tribal though, but the font is dead on late-nineties cheese radio nu-rock. Those guys know how to bring the riff.
 __________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 6:11pm - Niccolai ""]
FuckIsMySignature said:Crates fall apart after 2 years... at least mine did


That's one crate. Not all crates. Shockwaves are indestructable monsters of sweet harmonic brutality.
 ________________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 7:41pm - My_Dying_Bride ""]
FleshFries said:i wonder what the last post in this thread is going to be....


[img]
sorry....i had to
 _______________________________
[Jul 19,2007 11:02pm - blue ""]
Niccolai said:FuckIsMySignature said:Crates fall apart after 2 years... at least mine did


That's one crate. Not all crates. Shockwaves are indestructable monsters of sweet harmonic brutality.



the gx-130c head im picking up will smoke your shockwave.
 ___________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 11:29pm - brian_dc ""]
it's like blue smells gear talk in a thread and comes in to drop his opinion off instinctively

it's creepy
 ____________________________________________
[Jul 19,2007 11:39pm - FuckIsMySignature ""]
Niccolai said:FuckIsMySignature said:Crates fall apart after 2 years... at least mine did


That's one crate. Not all crates. Shockwaves are indestructable monsters of sweet harmonic brutality.



my buddy's fell apart too. i will agree they have a sweet metal tone though. thats why i bought it in the first place. maybe the shockwave is the result of better production... i'll have to try it sometime. i have a toneblaster now which is decent but i never use it because my band has their own rig for me to use. laziness prevails.



ohh and asystole blows fat cock.
 _____________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 10:10am - immortal13 ""]
Big and Short said:What the fuck? You will see us play one more time and you will respect us. We will smoke every band on this board. Be there(middle east) or don't listen to the best live band one more time


Any band that thinks they can smoke any other band on this board should have called it quits before they even started. Hah, I'm kinda glad. That's one more band we don't have to deal with in New England!
 ________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 11:07am - slow  ""]
Any band that thinks they can smoke any other band on this board should have called it quits before they even started. Hah, I'm kinda glad. That's one more band we don't have to deal with in New England!


Yeah but what if each band member starts a new band. Destruction causes multiplication. When the band was intact, the problem was contained.
 ___________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 11:20am - archaeon ""]
"check out my sweet band
http://www.myspace.com/asystoleband
we're playing our last show at the mid east in cambridge Sat.
show your support.
and if your a rttpee pee head no need to show up."
 _____________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 11:46am - FleshFries ""]
rttpee pee head......haha thats priceless
 ______________________________
[Jul 20,2007 11:48am - pam ""]
What a great thread.
 ______________________________
[Jul 20,2007 11:51am - pam ""]
"ASYSTOLE'S debut EP is a seven-track blend of ambient samples, heart pounding riffs, crunchy screams, passionate melodies, and brutal drums. Lyric wise, every song evokes different feelings of inner torment and mental anguish while the overall messages remain hopeful and true. Through their harmony of hardcore licks and hard rock grooves, accompanied by an explosive live show, ASYSTOLE continues to permeate all spheres of heavy sounding music, leaving audiences in a transfix of enthrallment."


A TRANSFIX OF ENTHRALLMENT....HAHAHAHAHAH
 ____________________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 11:53am - FuckIsMySignature ""]
archaeon said:"check out my sweet band
http://www.myspace.com/asystoleband
we're playing our last show at the mid east in cambridge Sat.
show your support.
and if your a rttpee pee head no need to show up."



where did you find that gem?

 _____________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 11:56am - FleshFries ""]
http://youtube.com/watch?v=BABWQ2iJW6g

everybody go and rate it 1 star
 ___________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 11:56am - archaeon ""]
the guys AIM profile
 ______________________________
[Jul 20,2007 11:58am - pam ""]
FleshFries said:http://youtube.com/watch?v=BABWQ2iJW6g

everybody go and rate it 1 star



I'm so glad the sound on my laptop is broken.
 ____________________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 12:00pm - FuckIsMySignature ""]
this band is turning into the William Hung of the metal industry.

[img]
 ___________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 12:09pm - DeRtOxIa ""]
FleshFries said:http://youtube.com/watch?v=BABWQ2iJW6g

everybody go and rate it 1 star



hahahah the guitarist and bassist are head banging out of time with each other
 __________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 12:12pm - C.DEAD  ""]
I watched it with the sound off and it was marvelous. I like how the one kid in the place isnt even watching them. Nice jump too, really cool.
 __________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 12:13pm - C.DEAD  ""]
"hahahah the guitarist and bassist are head banging out of time with each other "

I just noticed that, very akward.
 ___________________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 12:24pm - Fuck Logging In  ""]
Tonight Bitches...maybe someone on this Board is actually cool and can actually respect band hard work. Sorry we tried something new and not something rehashed like all you sheep metal people do. you just fallow each like sheep and listen to bands that all sound the same and do the same blast beats and same pig vocals...and you call us unoriginal?

So come down and think for yourselves. If you can.
 _________________________________
[Jul 20,2007 12:25pm - xmikex ""]
STAP FALLOWING DA SHEEP!!!!!!!

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