a Story by Mr.Kok[views:2189][posts:26]__________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 2:19am - powerkok ""] Im listening to suffocation- torn into enthrallment it brings me back to a simpler time, when I lived in Philly, was in an industrial band called Prototype Infinity, and all of my immediate family was still alive. It reminds of a fun little story. It was 1 am in center city, and I was drunk and bleeding from my hand.(thats a different story). me and my thai friend felt like lobster, where the hell do you get lobster at 1 am?? PHILLY. The chinese never sleep. So we venture into the unnaturally cool summer city night, on a quest for the shelled crustacean. Well, we found a place and we ate lobster and had more drinks. I spilled a L.I. ice tea all over myself. So, now im wet at the crotch, and hammered and lobstered up. We make our way back to the truck and see a degenerate standing there. I have a very strong esp type thing goin, always have, and something told me, he wasnt just loitering there at 2 am. In order to get to the truck, we have to walk by this guy..As I get closer, I see hes looking long and hard at us....not a good sign. Before I go on, let me say that the FIRST thing I did when moving to Philly, was get a concealed weapons permit. So I was packing at ALL times...in the store, the bank, my job, drunk at the bar, everywhere. Sure enough, said degenerate waits till were within 7-8 feet from him and says 'got a light?' CMON!!??? got a light?? isnt that what every mugger in every mugger movie says????? So, without a seconds hesitation, I say 'yeah, I have a light" As I open my jacket, I intentionally flash my .45, sitting dormant in a shoulder holster, just waiting to spit death on some cunt wanting to take what isnt his. In a split second the guy turns around and RUNS! Tell me he really wanted a light. With that out of the way, we get in the truck, and decide, lets go home. Easier said than done with 2 drunks at the wheel. Not being from the area, I have no idea where the fuck I am, and my navigator is mumbling in thai. We are sooo fucking lost. I whip out my one hitter...Somehow I drop it. really wanting to get it back into its safe haven of my pocket, I decide to stop at a 7-11 and look for it. While im looking for it with a flashlight under my seat, a car pulls in next to us, I thought nothing of it. My friend who was in the store...comes out, I look up, and notice the car next to me is a Philly cop and his partner. Great. Just get back in the truck, get tsungsun back in the truck, and go. Right? Wrong...Tsungsun beelines to the cop car. " hey, were lost, can u tell my friend how to get to south philly?" I was going to jail for dui in philly with a pipe of pot in the car, that I still havent found. Even at this drunken point in time, I pulled it together enough to come up with, "I lost the directions somewhere and I cant find them...I think they fell under the seat....how do you get back to south philly?" The next 2 seconds were agonizing....he knew I was shitfaced, I knew it...and I waited for that ever sickening, 'step out of the vehicle' To my amazement, he says... "take a right out of here and ....." Did I fake my way out of a dui? It certainly was looking like it. Sure enough after pretending to listen and understand his directions, we were off again. Aimless. Miles later, I see a plane...A PLANE!!!!! 'were close to the airport!!" I said " I know how to get home from the airport" I say well...I start hauling ass thru side streets trying to follow a fucking airplane. You wont believe this, but it worked. I felt like a drunken mc guyver. The lights of the Philadelphia international airport glowed in the dark like gold dubloons to a pirate. So there we are. now, how the fuck do you get out the airports winding and confusing roads? I ended up driving over a parking barrier, because there were those tire popping spikes in the exit. A big fat black lady came running out and screaming 'what the fuck....etc" Finally...I am homeward bound. I will be in my hood in less than 10 minutes. Wrong. I have to drop off my friend. So, I do, and as Im leaving, I see him get into his sisters car. WTF?? why is he driving? and where? I dont care at this point. I just want to go home. as I head up his block, I stop at a red light. Quicker than shit, I see headlights HAULING ASS right at me from behind. I had a half a second to let off my brakes, trying to minimize the impact. BOOOOOM!!! My buddy crashed into me with his sisters car. He wanted to come over and smoke some pot. Now, listening to this suffocation, instead of the pure sick feeling I had that whole night, I feel all warm and fuzzy, reminiscing of a time, although a very short time, that I had the world beat. Thanks Suffocation. |
| _________________________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 2:37am - the_taste_of_cigarettes ""] that was deep i actually read the whole thing, usually I just skim stuff. |
| ___________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 2:57am - kyledoes ""] lets watch golden girls!! |
| ____________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 3:13am - MyDeadDoll ""] i've gotten lost in the philly airport, does that count? wonderful story, tho =) |
| _________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 12:01pm - Assuck ""] that story actually held my attention, which is no small feat. |
| __________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 2:49pm - powerkok ""] Im going to write a book eventually, called Born to be Metal It will chronologically follow my life from the age of 2. I seriously have stories that I sometimes dont even believe. but they are all 100% true and accurate. They have made movies that are much less interesting. |
| _________________________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 2:51pm - the_taste_of_cigarettes ""] you should just call the book: Jesse, Montana that is a fucking astounding name. I still can't believe it's real! |
| ____________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 2:51pm - MyDeadDoll ""] you should do it =) |
| ___________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 4:25pm - jellyfish ""] philly airport is fucking huge. |
| ____________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 5:02pm - MyDeadDoll ""] there's like a fucking mall in there |
| ___________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 5:10pm - jellyfish ""] seriously. |
| ________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 5:41pm - Assuck ""] your name is jesse montana? you should be a wrestler |
| _______________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 6:19pm - Joe/NotCommon ""] haha amazing story. |
| ________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 8:07pm - retzam ""] Hahahaha, yes, a very good story. |
| ______________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 9:00pm - the_reverend ""] the only think I don't like about this is that you are a cock sucker for driving while drunk, you fuck. you should have been thinking about your kids and not driving. dui and dwi super pisses me off. |
| __________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 9:07pm - succubus ""] you should add that you lost family members due to drunk driving was a cool story though |
| ______________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 9:08pm - the_reverend ""] it is a cool story, for the surprise ending, but dwi is moronic. just fucking stay at home. |
| __________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 9:11pm - succubus ""] i don't know what the difference btwn DUI and DWI |
| ________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 9:12pm - Hooker ""] Hmm.... yeah. |
| ______________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 9:12pm - the_reverend ""] DUI encompasses "other" things DWI is just alcohol |
| _________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 10:12pm - retzam ""] so... DUI = Driving Under Influence what does DWI stand for?? |
| _________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 10:14pm - Assuck ""] driving while intoxicated |
| _________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 10:14pm - Assuck ""] i think |
| ___________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 10:15pm - succubus ""] driving while intoxicated i just never knew the diff |
| ___________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 10:15pm - succubus ""] yep |
| ___________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 10:45pm - powerkok ""] ya, I know, I was wicked stupid for driving like that, and I know it sounds cliche, but I really did drive well. No excuse for it tho. |
| ___________________________________ [Sep 28,2004 10:47pm - powerkok ""] Assuck said:your name is jesse montana? you should be a wrestler hahaha I hear that one alot... along with a cowboy, a rock star, and a quarterback. |