So I almost farted on my Physical Therapist today.[views:5905][posts:14]__________________________________________ [Jun 7,2006 10:22pm - notorious_D.U.G. ""] When I got home from work today I went and squatted a grump. But realizing I was running behind schedule I had to cut it short. Bad move. All the way there I felt the poopquakes in my guts and knew it was only a matter of time. So I get there and the first thing she does is give me a low back massage. She's kinda cute so it was all good. I started to get all relaxed. Then it dawned on me . . . I could at any moment now gas her. That ruined the whole experience. My feet were twitching. I started sweating. No way I could enjoy myself after that. It started getting real scary when I had to turn over and do knee to chest bends. It was like a Mr. Wizard experiment trying to keep that shit contained. Oh well. |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 7,2006 10:39pm - davefromthegrave ""] best thread ever. |
| _____________________________________ [Jun 7,2006 10:42pm - sacreligion ""] your physical therpaist has a today? |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 7,2006 10:44pm - notorious_D.U.G. ""] hahah. shut up. I even edited that in. i'm stupid. it was supposed to be therapist's hand today but I forgot hand. |
| _____________________________________ [Jun 7,2006 10:52pm - sacreligion ""] hahaha it's all good you should've gone through man...instead of dreading the remaining moments of your massage you would've found them to be hilarious |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 7,2006 10:56pm - notorious_D.U.G. ""] yeah but I still have to look her in the eyes and talk to her for 8 more weeks. I'd probably be pawned off on to another therapist. Or she would've left her husband for me. who knows? |
| _________________________________ [Jun 8,2006 12:48am - mcmahon ""] haha, first thread i clicked on. |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 8,2006 1:31am - animalrampage ""] Brilliant |
| _________________________________________ [Jun 9,2006 4:07pm - notorious_D.U.G. ""] It's official, back rubs make me want to fart. Don't really understand it, but it's true. Had another visit today. The chamber was clear but I still had the urge to fumigate. I need to stop being such a pussy and commit to farting on her and just get it the fuck out of the way already. |
| _____________________________________ [Jun 9,2006 4:28pm - the_reverend ""] [img] |
| _______________________________________________ [Jun 9,2006 5:00pm - mark fucking richards ""] i have physical therapy tonight; maybe i'll harbor some fumes for my therapist. her name is sheila and she has a wicked 80's perm |
| _________________________________________ [Jun 9,2006 5:49pm - notorious_D.U.G. ""] maybe you'll straighten that perm with an SBD. |
| _____________________________ [Jun 9,2006 6:49pm - yeti ""] love the gas man, LOVE IT this is why we're here |
| ___________________________________ [Jun 9,2006 8:17pm - anonymous ""] 10/10 thread |
| __________________________________ [Jun 9,2006 8:19pm - dreadkill ""] i have to go squat a grump right now. |