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I kinda sorta shit myself last night

[views:3942][posts:24]
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[Feb 21,2007 10:56am - starmummy ""]
So I was sitting on my couch curled up with a blanket watching American Hardcore by myself when all of a sudden my stomach started rumbling. I run to grab a magazine, pinching my ass cheeks as I hop to the bathroom. I sit down and this huge shit explosion splashes into the toilet soaking my ass with shit water.

Anyway, after I'm done, I go to pull up my underwear and I notice a small amount of a brownish mucus-like sludge in my undies. I tried to wash them in the sink and eventually just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.

This is the third out of the last 4 nights that I have had the squirts. I think I have worms or something.
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[Feb 21,2007 11:03am - Ryan_M ""]
I hate when you feel like you have to fart, and when you push it out, it feels moist and you find out you leaked about a teaspoon of diarrhea in your pants.
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[Feb 21,2007 11:47am - menstrual_sweatpants_disco ""]
starmummy said:just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.


Why didn't you just wash them?
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[Feb 21,2007 12:04pm - JDDomination ""]
Ryan_M said:I hate when you feel like you have to fart, and when you push it out, it feels moist and you find out you leaked about a teaspoon of diarrhea in your pants.


I may never use a teaspoon again because of this.
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[Feb 21,2007 12:08pm - starmummy ""]
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:starmummy said:just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.


Why didn't you just wash them?




Uh, eww.
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[Feb 21,2007 12:10pm - Ryan_M ""]
JDDomination said:Ryan_M said:I hate when you feel like you have to fart, and when you push it out, it feels moist and you find out you leaked about a teaspoon of diarrhea in your pants.


I may never use a teaspoon again because of this.



Hahaha I can picture having to make something that calls for a teaspoon of whatever:
"Oh God, some guy on RTTP made a post about having a teaspoon of diarrhea in his pants! Fuck this!"
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[Feb 21,2007 12:22pm - Dissector NLI  ""]
starmummy said:So I was sitting on my couch curled up with a blanket watching American Hardcore by myself when all of a sudden my stomach started rumbling. I run to grab a magazine, pinching my ass cheeks as I hop to the bathroom. I sit down and this huge shit explosion splashes into the toilet soaking my ass with shit water.

Anyway, after I'm done, I go to pull up my underwear and I notice a small amount of a brownish mucus-like sludge in my undies. I tried to wash them in the sink and eventually just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.

This is the third out of the last 4 nights that I have had the squirts. I think I have worms or something.




Where'd you get American Hardcore already?
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[Feb 21,2007 12:30pm - starmummy ""]
Dissector NLI said:starmummy said:So I was sitting on my couch curled up with a blanket watching American Hardcore by myself when all of a sudden my stomach started rumbling. I run to grab a magazine, pinching my ass cheeks as I hop to the bathroom. I sit down and this huge shit explosion splashes into the toilet soaking my ass with shit water.

Anyway, after I'm done, I go to pull up my underwear and I notice a small amount of a brownish mucus-like sludge in my undies. I tried to wash them in the sink and eventually just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.

This is the third out of the last 4 nights that I have had the squirts. I think I have worms or something.




Where'd you get American Hardcore already?



It came out yesterday. Great movie and book.
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[Feb 21,2007 12:37pm - Yeti ""]
hahaha that sucks, see i learned to control my bowels at a very young age.
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[Feb 21,2007 12:49pm - ariavette ""]
this is definately the wrong thread for lunchtime entertainment...
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[Feb 21,2007 12:50pm - farfegnugen  ""]
b.e.t
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[Feb 21,2007 1:28pm - menstrual_sweatpants_disco ""]
starmummy said:menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:starmummy said:just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.


Why didn't you just wash them?




Uh, eww.



So you shit all over your own ass every single day for life, then clean it up with a dry piece of semi-absorbent paper. Then, while in the shower hours later you rinse luke-warm soapy water over your turdcutter for two and a half seconds and consider that clean. Yet having your washing machine vigorously clean your underpants in scalding hot water, soap, and bleech for 45 minutes after you've already removed most fecal remnants from said underpants is disgusting? Makes sense.
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[Feb 21,2007 1:31pm - Dissector NLI  ""]
starmummy said:Dissector NLI said:starmummy said:So I was sitting on my couch curled up with a blanket watching American Hardcore by myself when all of a sudden my stomach started rumbling. I run to grab a magazine, pinching my ass cheeks as I hop to the bathroom. I sit down and this huge shit explosion splashes into the toilet soaking my ass with shit water.

Anyway, after I'm done, I go to pull up my underwear and I notice a small amount of a brownish mucus-like sludge in my undies. I tried to wash them in the sink and eventually just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.

This is the third out of the last 4 nights that I have had the squirts. I think I have worms or something.




Where'd you get American Hardcore already?



It came out yesterday. Great movie and book.




Yeah saw the movie and read the book, I didn't know it came out already. I'll be picking that up tonight/
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[Feb 21,2007 3:20pm - Yeti ""]
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:starmummy said:menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:starmummy said:just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.


Why didn't you just wash them?




Uh, eww.



So you shit all over your own ass every single day for life, then clean it up with a dry piece of semi-absorbent paper. Then, while in the shower hours later you rinse luke-warm soapy water over your turdcutter for two and a half seconds and consider that clean. Yet having your washing machine vigorously clean your underpants in scalding hot water, soap, and bleech for 45 minutes after you've already removed most fecal remnants from said underpants is disgusting? Makes sense.



i can see your point, but to me, once you've shit on some form of clothing, its tainted forever. i however dont get the whole "shitting your pants" thing. i havent shit my pants since i was little, i have control over my bodily functions. weirdos.
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[Feb 21,2007 3:24pm - starmummy ""]
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:starmummy said:menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:starmummy said:just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.


Why didn't you just wash them?




Uh, eww.



So you shit all over your own ass every single day for life, then clean it up with a dry piece of semi-absorbent paper. Then, while in the shower hours later you rinse luke-warm soapy water over your turdcutter for two and a half seconds and consider that clean. Yet having your washing machine vigorously clean your underpants in scalding hot water, soap, and bleech for 45 minutes after you've already removed most fecal remnants from said underpants is disgusting? Makes sense.



Let me come to your house next time you do laundry and take a shit in your washing machine. Do you really think that's going to get it clean. Shit needs to be disposed of, not washed. As far as the washing your ass thing goes, I am a vigorous ass washer (for obvious reasons). That's the cleanest part of my body from the time I shower to the time I shit.
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[Feb 21,2007 3:25pm - ariavette ""]
Yeti said:menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:starmummy said:menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:starmummy said:just put them in a plastic bag to go out with the trash.


Why didn't you just wash them?




Uh, eww.



So you shit all over your own ass every single day for life, then clean it up with a dry piece of semi-absorbent paper. Then, while in the shower hours later you rinse luke-warm soapy water over your turdcutter for two and a half seconds and consider that clean. Yet having your washing machine vigorously clean your underpants in scalding hot water, soap, and bleech for 45 minutes after you've already removed most fecal remnants from said underpants is disgusting? Makes sense.



i can see your point, but to me, once you've shit on some form of clothing, its tainted forever. i however dont get the whole "shitting your pants" thing. i havent shit my pants since i was little, i have control over my bodily functions. weirdos.



i would have to agree.. shit and puik.. once it's touched clothes... trash... mostly b/c i dont have the stomach to actually pick it up and put it in the washer to begin with.
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[Feb 21,2007 3:26pm - Yeti ""]
puking is different, i've done that many times. shit is an entirely different world.
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[Feb 21,2007 3:29pm - starmummy ""]
Yeti said:puking is different, i've done that many times. shit is an entirely different world.

The last time it happened was when I was a teenager and I just ripped a fart and ended up painting my undies brown. I remember jumping out my bedroom window and running into the woods and throwing the evidence into a bush.

I still think its worms.

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[Feb 21,2007 3:30pm - menstrual_sweatpants_disco ""]
starmummy said:Let me come to your house next time you do laundry and take a shit in your washing machine. Do you really think that's going to get it clean. Shit needs to be disposed of, not washed. As far as the washing your ass thing goes, I am a vigorous ass washer (for obvious reasons). That's the cleanest part of my body from the time I shower to the time I shit.



menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:after you've already removed most fecal remnants from said underpants


I'm going to have to fight you over this, I hope you know.
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[Feb 21,2007 3:31pm - starmummy ""]
menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:starmummy said:Let me come to your house next time you do laundry and take a shit in your washing machine. Do you really think that's going to get it clean. Shit needs to be disposed of, not washed. As far as the washing your ass thing goes, I am a vigorous ass washer (for obvious reasons). That's the cleanest part of my body from the time I shower to the time I shit.



menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:after you've already removed most fecal remnants from said underpants


I'm going to have to fight you over this, I hope you know.




Bring it on bitch!
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[Feb 21,2007 3:33pm - menstrual_sweatpants_disco ""]
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[Feb 21,2007 3:34pm - menstrual_sweatpants_disco ""]
starmummy said:Bring it on bitch!


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[Feb 21,2007 3:35pm - starmummy ""]
Come to think of it, I think it was old cheese that did it. I had some salsa con queso in my shed from a week ago. I figured it was cold enough and I wouldn’t have to refrigerate it. I mixed in some Smoked Chipotle Tabasco sauce and had some Tostitos and about 30 minutes later…

I'm not sure why I had the shits Friday and Saturday nights though. Maybe it is worms.
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[Feb 21,2007 3:58pm - AUTOPSY_666 ""]
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[Feb 21,2007 4:02pm - ZenErik ""]
That was fucking br00tal...

And I'm just about to have a bite to eat.


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