need to pass a drug test[views:3182][posts:28]_______________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 4:52pm - lsd shroomer ""] I haven't smoked weed in about 2 or 3 days and I have a drug test tomorrow. I'm also too broke to buy detox. Anyone ever passed one of these when you really shouldn't have? |
| ___________________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 4:53pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] get someone elses piss |
| ________________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 5:09pm - josh_hates_you ""] http://www.returntothepit.com/view.php?formid=35702&highlight=drug+test http://www.returntothepit.com/view.php?formid=33076&highlight=drug+test http://www.returntothepit.com/view.php?formid=25619&highlight=drug+test dont be such lazy fuckin hippie. the search button is over there<. |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 5:10pm - RichHorror ""] And up there. ^ |
| __________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 5:12pm - powerkok ""] 2-3 days? If youre a regular smoker, you are fucked, unless you buy a detox kit. They come with a piss test so you know if youll pass or not. If its important that you pass, scrape up 20 bucks asap, because you are not going to magically just pass. |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 5:32pm - lsd shroomer ""] i hate life |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 5:33pm - lsd shroomer ""] i don't even know what kind of test it will be |
| ___________________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 5:35pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] is it for work or the authorities? |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 6:17pm - lsd shroomer ""] work |
| ___________________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 6:48pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] then just get some elses clean urine, store it in a small bottle, and keep it warm with a heating pad. when you get to your test... go in the bathroom and pretend you are pissing but pour that into the sample cup instead. it helps if your bottle makes a squirting sound. works like a charm |
| ______________________________ [Jul 16,2008 8:13pm - Mess ""] i was in the same predicament a couple of weeks ago. poland springs makes a really small bottle. get clean piss (male or female) it doesn't matter and poor it in the bottle. put on some tighty whitey's and jock the bottle. |
| ________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 9:24pm - samYam ""] I have passed numerous drug tests a couple years back while working for a temp agency. The simplest, cheapest way to do this is to drink water, and shitloads of it. You want to drink it so by the time you take the test you've already pissed once or twice. By that time you'll be pissing pretty much straight out water... drink water, fuck goldenseal, the over the counter pass a drug test scam stuff, turn on the tap and drink water. It has not only worked for me but for my wife when she worked on a ship and had to pass USCG drug tests randomly. |
| __________________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 9:28pm - fuck logging in ""] I know a kid who knows how to make fake urine, its incredibly easy, but I forgot how he does it. |
| ________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 9:30pm - samYam ""] there's no need to go broke, make your own fake piss, bring someone else's piss, etc... drink water and bring your own clean piss, fresh from the source! |
| __________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 9:43pm - archaeon ""] fuck%20logging%20in said:I know a kid who knows how to make fake urine, its incredibly easy, but I forgot how he does it. well that helps |
| ________________________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 10:36pm - IllinoisEnemaBradness ""] fuck%20logging%20in said:I know a kid who knows how to make fake urine, its incredibly easy, but I forgot how he does it. fuck logging in and fuck making a point |
| ___________________________________ [Jul 16,2008 10:55pm - powerkok ""] Water helps, but for an everyday smoker, it wont make you pass, by itself. If you chance it, and just drink water, DO NOT EAT for at least 12 hours before the test. If you can hold out for 24 hours, even better. THC stores in your fat cells among many other places, and if you eat, new fat cells replace the old, thc infested fat cells, which are then expelled through your piss. So if nothing else, try that. I have had been tested 2x and used the kit, and passed no prob. The bottle thing.....pff, that may have worked in 1995, but nowadays, there are thermometers built into the cup you are pissing in, if that cup does not read 98.6 +/- .1-2, they will know. Also, they sometimes even stand in there with you while you piss, (although, thats more likely for probation only). That bottle crinkles just once, and youre fucked. Dont worry about not even knowing what kind of test it is, because if its a hair test, you cant beat it anyway. |
| ____________________________________________ [Jul 17,2008 12:06am - FuckIsMySignature ""] powerkok said: The bottle thing.....pff, that may have worked in 1995, but nowadays, there are thermometers built into the cup you are pissing in, if that cup does not read 98.6 +/- .1-2, they will know. Also, they sometimes even stand in there with you while you piss, (although, thats more likely for probation only). That bottle crinkles just once, and youre fucked. . I did it 2 years ago. The trick is get one of those one time use heating pads for sports injuries and such. they cost like a 1.29 at cvs. they keep the bottle at the same temperature as your body. just put the bottle against your inner thigh then strap the heating pad over it. you'll be good to go. the only reason i had to do this was because i took the fucking drink and my test showed up as my system being "deluded with water" - so the made take another one the next morning. be aware that you fail a test for that (even by drinking just too much water). Some places are more anal about it than others. |
| _________________________________ [Jul 17,2008 11:53am - samyam ""] I smoked religiously 2-3 a day and passed every test drinking only water. |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 17,2008 12:01pm - ouchdrummer ""] water doesnt work anymore, it comes up dilluted and they make you take it again the next day. If you do that twice, you fail. Goldenseal doesnt work anymore, EVERY lab piss test also tests for this. Someone else's piss works... if you can keep it above 80degrees which is hard even in you pants, cause most of the cups you piss into have a thermometor strip on the side that they check RIGHT after you piss. Although they do sell a thing called the urinator, looks like a dick and stores fake piss (you can buy powdered refills) and keeps it warm, although its about 100$ so for your purposes it prolly wont work. Your only really safe way to do it is to buy one of the proven drinks, i can swear by one that got me out of state paid vacations a couple times, it's called vale, you can by it at Buried Treasures on Haviland st. down by Berkely College. It's 50$ you drink it between 30min and 5 hours before your test, your good. If you dont have the money BORROW IT FROM SOMEONE. cause it's the only legitimate way to be sure. |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 17,2008 12:05pm - SkinSandwich ""] Try not doing drugs, but I would not actually recommend it. If you knew that this test was coming up why did you smoke a few days before it? |
| __________________________________________ [Jul 17,2008 12:05pm - Conservationist ""] I keep the bottle in my rectum, which keeps it at exactly 98 degrees. |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 17,2008 1:21pm - fleshfries ""] If you don't pass just tell them you eat poppy seed bagels every morning for breakfast, then tell them you would like to reschedule it so you have time to get it out of your system...I'm pretty sure Mythbusters proved it. |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 17,2008 1:27pm - lsd shroomer ""] SkinSandwich said:Try not doing drugs, but I would not actually recommend it. If you knew that this test was coming up why did you smoke a few days before it? well I didn't know til I had the interview the other day. so I took it this morning. I drank about a gallon of water, pissed 7 times and took some multi vitamins because the b-vitamins make piss yellow. it looked pretty authentic but I don't have the results yet. |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 17,2008 1:29pm - lsd shroomer ""] if I have to take it again I'll get some kind of dildo shaped container, tell my dad to piss in it then I'll stick it up my ass. |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 28,2008 7:55pm - lsd shroomer ""] I passed. Water and multi vitamins FTW you fags. |
| ___________________________________________ [Jul 28,2008 7:57pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] good for you :middlefinger: |
| ________________________________ [Jul 28,2008 8:29pm - samYam ""] good deal, the water worked... |