So I saw my doctor today[views:3762][posts:56]____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 2:27pm - immortal13 ""] And he said I have to get laid within two weeks, because he put me on some new stress medication and wants to know if it has any affects. This is the only time I will ever say that life would be easier with a girlfriend right now. |
| _________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 2:47pm - Martins ""] I can help you with that. |
| ___________________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 3:05pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] get a hooker instead |
| ________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 3:07pm - xmikex ""] get a bag of candy and a car with a big trunk |
| __________________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 3:07pm - Corpus_Colostomy ""] ever hear of epididimitis? my bros has it. you gotta have your nuts drained on a reg basis. his wife works hard......real haaaaaahd kehd. |
| __________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 3:08pm - archaeon ""] FuckIsMySignature said:get a hooker instead and write it off on your health care so it's free. |
| __________________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 3:33pm - Mr. Opportunity ""] Dammit...why didn't you go to the doctor a month ago and post this before I went to the doctor! I coulda coerced my ex-gf into a severance pop... |
| ____________________________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 4:49pm - menstrual_sweatpants_disco ""] xmikex said:get a bag of candy and a car with a big trunk Yeah, borrow my car. |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 4:56pm - Hungtableed ""] I saw my doctor 3 weeks ago because I was nauseous and it turned out I had a blood pressure reading of 190/111. Yeah...I was given blood pressure meds. |
| __________________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 4:58pm - largefreakatzero ""] Hungtableed said:I saw my doctor 3 weeks ago because I was nauseous and it turned out I had a blood pressure reading of 190/111. Yeah...I was given blood pressure meds. Join the club. |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 4:59pm - Hungtableed ""] 25 years old and on beta blocker high blood pressure meds. Sweet. At least I get ripped and pass out when I take them at night. |
| __________________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 5:02pm - largefreakatzero ""] That's some hardcore shit -- I'm just on water pills. |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 5:03pm - Hungtableed ""] I got my BP taken the other day and it was 149/51....Better, but not too good. |
| ___________________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 5:33pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] whats the matter... your hand broken? |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 5:48pm - immortal13 ""] I can borrow our tour van and use that. What's the matter is I've been pretty damn stressed out lately, and he put me on some medication to keep my stress level down a bit, and lower my boiling point. He just wants to know asap if it effects my sexual performance in any way. If I had done this a week ago I would have been all set, so now I have to go through all that trouble again. |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 5:51pm - the_reverend ""] I have epididimitis too. I swear |
| ___________________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 5:51pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] theres gotta be some sluts on this board who can help this poor bastard out |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 5:53pm - ellesarusrex ""] i know some easy broads. but blue is first on the list lol. |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 5:55pm - immortal13 ""] Plus he's not exactly my type. |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 5:58pm - ellesarusrex ""] hahaha. pretty intense.. that you have to get laid.. couldnt you just give yourself a vigorous fist fuck. get the heart racing and gets you off.. |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:08pm - immortal13 ""] Well, I wouldn't exactly mind going with the docs orders on this one. Otherwise it's not as intense, and it wouldn't get the job done ;) |
| __________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:13pm - archaeon ""] immortal13 said:I can borrow our tour van and use that. that reminds me, would you guys be willing to rent that out a weekend or something? I'll send you an message to discuss further if it's possible mangggg. |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:14pm - the_reverend ""] I would like to call bullshit on this |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:15pm - immortal13 ""] I wouldn't mind, but I doubt it man. The thing is kind of a piece, and we're honestly surprised it lasted the whole tour. I'm just looking out for you guys because a. I don't want you guys getting stranded and b. I don't want anyone to try to hold you liable incase something goes wrong. Now back to the getting me laid subject. |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:18pm - immortal13 ""] the_reverend said:I would like to call bullshit on this Trust me, it's no bullshit. It definitely sounds like it, but I'm actually being serious. |
| __________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:21pm - archaeon ""] immortal13 said:I wouldn't mind, but I doubt it man. The thing is kind of a piece, and we're honestly surprised it lasted the whole tour. I'm just looking out for you guys because a. I don't want you guys getting stranded and b. I don't want anyone to try to hold you liable incase something goes wrong. alright understood, couldn't hurt to ask haha |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:23pm - immortal13 ""] If you get me laid by one of your hott friends I could make it happen. I'm only half kidding. |
| _________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:25pm - Martins ""] Ask him about Steph. |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:31pm - immortal13 ""] Who's this Steph person you speak of? |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:35pm - the_reverend ""] would you be ok if steph had a dick? im pretty sure there isn't any medicine that would exclude total fags. |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:38pm - immortal13 ""] Problem is then it goes back to the enjoyable factor, and that wouldn't exactly be very enjoyable. |
| _________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:43pm - Martins ""] As long as you have 1/8 of a dick, Steph's alllllll good. |
| __________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:44pm - archaeon ""] :( |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 6:48pm - the_reverend ""] dude, with an uptight attitude like that, no wonder no laids. there are a lot more enjoyable things in this world than getting laids. like ice cream, hanging wsith yur bros, and anal. |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 10:26pm - ellesarusrex ""] the doctors script didnt say enjoy the sex... no.. yes?? |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 10:31pm - DrewBlood ""] make sure you let us know what the side effects are, you might need a second opinion |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 10:36pm - ellesarusrex ""] seriously... people should be there just to make sure you're ok. what if somethgin goes wrong.. !?? |
| __________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 10:38pm - sxealex ""] something tells me you didnt need this excuse to want to touch a va-j-j XD |
| ____________________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 10:38pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] DrewBlood said:make sure you let us know what the side effects are, you might need a second opinion side effects may include children and/or genital warts |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 10:41pm - ellesarusrex ""] FuckIsMySignature said: DrewBlood said:make sure you let us know what the side effects are, you might need a second opinion side effects may include children and/or genital warts win. |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 10:58pm - the_reverend ""] don't believe anything a doctor tells you when he's got a raging chubby. |
| _____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 11:00pm - immortal13 ""] Since it's a stress relief, it basically has a lot of the same side effects as most anti-depressants. For the record, it didn't say I had to enjoy it, but I might as well enjoy it to get the full effect. |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 11:03pm - the_reverend ""] iow: he juust wanted to know if you get ED |
| _____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 11:06pm - immortal13 ""] Probably. |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 11:07pm - ellesarusrex ""] drunk dick. |
| _____________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 11:14pm - immortal13 ""] I haven't been drunk since saturday (if that was directed at me). Disappointing. Thanks for reminding me about the lack of beer forced into my system the past few days! |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 29,2008 11:21pm - the_reverend ""] beer is for fags. |
| ____________________________________________ [Jul 30,2008 12:04am - FuckIsMySignature ""] only if the beer bottle is shaped like a dick |
| _______________________________ [Jul 30,2008 10:51am - Yeti ""] the_reverend said:fruity beer or putting fruit in beer is for fags. fixed |
| _______________________________________ [Jul 30,2008 10:51am - the_reverend ""] yeah, it's like putting cheese inside horseshit and calling it good. |
| __________________________________________ [Jul 30,2008 10:58am - metal_church101 ""] immortal13 said:And he said I have to get laid within two weeks, because he put me on some new stress medication and wants to know if it has any affects. This is the only time I will ever say that life would be easier with a girlfriend right now. What about your drummer, Sam? He always puts out and makes a great woman!!!! |
| ________________________________ [Jul 30,2008 12:55pm - aril ""] fastest way to get laid if you don't know any girl who are as desperate as you, is to go on craigslist and type an ad. i knew someone who used it and pretty much got obsessed |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 30,2008 1:02pm - the_reverend ""] craigslist... got AIDS? |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 30,2008 1:02pm - the_reverend ""] no?!? |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 30,2008 1:02pm - the_reverend ""] you will. |
| _____________________________________ [Jul 30,2008 3:57pm - ouchdrummer ""] the_reverend said:I have epididimitis too. I swear WOW, this is gonna sound like bullshit, but i too have epididymitis. I went to a doctor TODAY at Boston medical center. His name is Robert Oates. He fucking sucks. He is a Urologist, i waited two months to see him, i have been to the medical walkin twice, i have been to the er a handfull of times now, seen other doctors about a half dozen times, and the duchebag today told me that since nothings worked he thinks i should "wait it out" even though i have been on perks/morphine for almost four months now. |
| ____________________________________ [Jul 30,2008 6:34pm - immortal13 ""] I can see the craigslist ad now: Doctor says I need to get laid to test a new med I'm on. Anyone wanna take part in this experiment? |