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In A Meeting, Trying Hard Not to LOL

[views:4790][posts:44]
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[Oct 16,2008 3:05pm - xmikex ""]
I'm staffing a VTC right now, and people are talking about a guy named "Dick Fap". I don't know if that's the actual spelling of him name, and but as far as I'm concerned it is. Either way LulZ.
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[Oct 16,2008 3:08pm - aril  ""]
I believe there's a Dick Hurtz from Holden, MA as well.
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[Oct 16,2008 3:16pm - Yeti ""]
Dick Berg
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[Oct 16,2008 3:16pm - Lamp ""]
There was a customer at a company my mom used to work for named Dick Buttmarc.
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[Oct 16,2008 3:21pm - FuckIsMySignature ""]
funny names are funny
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[Oct 16,2008 3:23pm - brian_dc ""]
pretty sure I would lose my shit

I suck at holding my immaturity down at work
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[Oct 16,2008 3:27pm - This_Is_Heresy ""]
I seem to remember a person running for some office around here named Dick Sweat. I got some lolz from that.
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[Oct 16,2008 3:30pm - aril  ""]
it would be AWESOME if someone was named "Dan Druff"
Too bad Druff isn't a last name. ...or is it?
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[Oct 16,2008 3:34pm - xmikex ""]
Dick Army.
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[Oct 16,2008 3:49pm - the_reverend ""]
ok, I lol'd when I read
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[Oct 16,2008 3:50pm - BobNOMAAMRooney nli  ""]
Bonerland
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[Oct 16,2008 4:08pm - orgymf@work  ""]
i had to get a birth certificate today for a woman named Sparkle Heaven-Angel Smith today.....when i see names like that, i get angry, that a human being worthless enough to give their child such a name exists and is sharing my oxygen.

on the funny side, some the hysterical names i have seen (these are all names i have actually seen on Massachusetts birth/death/marriage certificates)
Joy Gay
Iona Blackman
Faith Ina Blackman
Susan White Power
Little Dick Johnson
Steve Greathead

also, under race (on alot of the older records) i have seen words such as yellow, colored, red, brown, negro, and (this one must have been a mistake made by a total moron) i saw a man whose fathers race was listed as "Mongoloid"

oh another of my favorites, on alot of the 30's and 40's, if one parent was black, and one white, they would put a question mark next to the childs race, and where the fathers name should be, it says "Natural Father Declared Colored"

ahhh, the good ol days, hahahaha.
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[Oct 16,2008 4:09pm - orgymf@work  ""]
hahaha....i just got another great one, right after that first response i posted, i just had to help someone whose mothers name was "Jennatul" (sound it out)
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[Oct 16,2008 4:11pm - xmikex ""]
IONA BLACKMAN
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[Oct 16,2008 4:11pm - archaeon ""]
hahahaha

dickfap

i must meet this man.
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[Oct 16,2008 4:12pm - orgymf@work  ""]

xmikex said:IONA BLACKMAN

hah, yeah that was my fav too.
funniest part is that it's a black woman.
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[Oct 16,2008 4:14pm - BobNOMAAMRooney nli  ""]

orgymf@work said:
xmikex said:IONA BLACKMAN

hah, yeah that was my fav too.
funniest part is that it's a black woman.



So when her kids ask does she them their daddy's on the underground railroad?
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[Oct 16,2008 4:14pm - BobNOMAAMRooney nli  ""]

BobNOMAAMRooney%20nli said:
orgymf@work said:
xmikex said:IONA BLACKMAN

hah, yeah that was my fav too.
funniest part is that it's a black woman.



So when her kids ask does she tell them their daddy's on the underground railroad?



Fiexd
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[Oct 16,2008 4:19pm - orgymf@work  ""]
HAHAHAHA!


Win
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[Oct 16,2008 4:43pm - Nobody_Cares ""]
I work with many names, here's the best

Earl Toothaker
Dusty Partner
Mark Spanks
Tangy Peppers
Justin Baggs
Big Eagle Paul (no joke)
Jeremy Pusey (we said pussy)
My girl told me of the last names Glasscock and an asian woman with the last name Damho. Funny names rule.
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[Oct 16,2008 7:12pm - DaveFromTheGrave ""]
I met a guy named Mike Hunt once, for real.
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[Oct 16,2008 7:22pm - FuckIsMySignature ""]
Dr. Roache A Stoner
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[Oct 16,2008 7:24pm - yummy ""]

DaveFromTheGrave said:I met a guy named Mike Hunt once, for real.


ME too. He works with my Dad. I also had an english teacher in high school named Richard Hunt.
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[Oct 16,2008 7:28pm - MarkFuckingRichards ""]
My boss used to work with a dude named Juan Ball...oddly enough he only had one ball.
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[Oct 17,2008 7:35am - Yeti ""]
i went to high school with this dude who had a horrendous limp, he was born with one knee facing the wrong way, and the dudes name was Dan Legg.
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[Oct 17,2008 7:47am - Josh_Martin ""]
I used to have to deal with this guy from India who's first name was Prikshit. I don't know if he knew what his name meant in English.

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[Oct 17,2008 8:04am - goatcatalyst ""]
When I had my internship at an "urban" middle school last year, the names I came across were astounding. Pure gold. I swear there's either some sort of Scrabble-esque game where parents get points for absurdity and/or bizarre letter combinations - how else would you even think of something as semantically unsound as "Romayzhjah"? Or "Dystani" pronounced "destiny"? There must be some oneupmanship going on in the colored community with cursing their children with hellish appelations. Black boys named "Taiwan" and girls named "India". Do negroes come from either country??? I named my betta fish "Bangladesh" in tribute to shwoogie naming practices.

Y'know, as much as I try to - we're talkin "conscious effort" here, folks - evenly distribute my loathing of humanity, certain populations go out of their way to demand special attention.

Perhaps one day my dream of widespread sterilization campaign will be a reality.
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[Oct 17,2008 8:56am - orgymf@work  ""]

Josh_Martin said:Prikshit.



for the win -l-
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[Oct 17,2008 9:55am - aril  ""]
i work with this kid named McLovin
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[Oct 17,2008 1:15pm - timma ""]
I have a client named Richard Dick.

And it's not just a clever name...he's a fucking douche.
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[Oct 17,2008 1:27pm - FuckIsMySignature ""]

Yeti said:i went to high school with this dude who had a horrendous limp, he was born with one knee facing the wrong way, and the dudes name was Dan Legg.


i thought his leg was fucked up from a car accident?
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[Oct 17,2008 1:27pm - Dan Legg  ""]
fuck you guys, just let me walk in peace
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[Oct 17,2008 1:31pm - ouchdrummer ""]

MarkFuckingRichards said:My boss used to work with a dude named Juan Ball...oddly enough he only had one ball.


hard to believe.... and why would you know about his ball? I guess if i had that name, AND only had one ball, i might joke about it with people too.
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[Oct 17,2008 3:22pm - Yeti ""]

FuckIsMySignature said:
Yeti said:i went to high school with this dude who had a horrendous limp, he was born with one knee facing the wrong way, and the dudes name was Dan Legg.


i thought his leg was fucked up from a car accident?



no, he was born with one of his knees facing the wrong way.
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[Oct 17,2008 3:23pm - darkwor  ""]
Steven Excellent
work login name: sexcellent
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[Oct 17,2008 9:52pm - IllinoisEnemaBradness ""]
when i worked with DYA at a copier repair place we had a meeting about the competition and what we could do to beat them. When the guy wrote "xerox" on the board, DYA turns to me and says "whose the straight-edge company named ero". I thought i was gonna pass out trying to hold the laughter in.
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[Oct 18,2008 11:20am - IllinoisEnemaBradness ""]
up
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[Oct 18,2008 1:14pm - sacreligion ""]
these were from a mailing list for a company i used to work for:

reuben fuchs
jackie asse
princess livingston

while on the topic of fuchs, i worked at an industrial supply warehouse a few years back and one of the companies we dealt with was named:

fuchs lubricants
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[Oct 18,2008 1:15pm - sacreligion ""]

IllinoisEnemaBradness said:when i worked with DYA at a copier repair place we had a meeting about the competition and what we could do to beat them. When the guy wrote "xerox" on the board, DYA turns to me and says "whose the straight-edge company named ero". I thought i was gonna pass out trying to hold the laughter in.


that story wins
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[Oct 18,2008 5:24pm - dreadkill ""]
lulz
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[Oct 18,2008 6:27pm - BobNOMAAMRooney nli  ""]
My half sister-in-law named her daughter Armani. I decided Armani was a little too upscale for her mother and made up an appropriately bastardized name for the niglet: Naw'tikuh Laren.

One of the things I'm looking forward to in an Obama presidency is the coming sea change in hoodrat naming conventions. Getting away from names driven by material desires and focusing more on names that will give their children the motivation to pursue successful professional careers. Names like: Electrakardiagram, Senata, Congressia, State'Comptrolla, Fishuarysandwildlifecommisshuner


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[Oct 19,2008 4:50pm - IllinoisEnemaBradness ""]

BobNOMAAMRooney%20nli said: Names like: Electrakardiagram, Senata, Congressia, State'Comptrolla, Fishuarysandwildlifecommisshuner





brilliant!!

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[Oct 19,2008 10:51pm - Dankill  ""]
When I worked a Stop & Shop in high school, I rang up a woman named Rita Magazine.


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