Tales from the Shithouse (new workplace defecation thread)[views:5477][posts:63]________________________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:16pm - Shithouse Philosopher ""] If it wasn't for RTTP mobile I'd be so bored in here. It's so quiet & peaceful. The drippy faucet is a little annoying though. |
| ____________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:17pm - arilliusbm ""] yea well, I was taking a shit and some fellow employee threw a wet paper towel at me.. it hit me in the face and I piddled on myself. let's hope that doesn't happen to you. |
| ________________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:17pm - DestroyYouAlot ""] NUH-UH |
| ____________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:19pm - arilliusbm ""] yea, I'm pissed. |
| _______________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:23pm - dftg ""] arilliusbm said:yea, I'm pissed. Well at least you're pissed off and not pissed on...uh nevermind |
| ________________________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:30pm - Shithouse Philosopher ""] Not a soul dared to even enter this time... win. Nothing ruins a trip to the shithouse like some lard ass who eats no fiber taking the stall next to you and loudly huffing & puffing his way through a shit that could qualify as cardiovascular exercise. |
| ____________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:31pm - arilliusbm ""] Yeah, we'll see how it goes when he's in the stall and I piss on a paper towel and toss it at him. I don't care if that gets me fired. |
| __________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:33pm - dertoxia ""] There's automatic lights in the bathroom at my work. today i took a shit long enough for the lights to go out halfway through. |
| _________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:34pm - Martins ""] Wait, how did you pee on yourself if you were taking a shit? |
| ____________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:46pm - arilliusbm ""] Trying to avoid the paper towel as you're pissing. |
| _________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 4:49pm - Martins ""] But you were shitting? I'm so confused. It's like a piss paradox. Pissadox. |
| __________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 5:02pm - sinistas ""] Both stalls in my departmental shitter were covered in dry piss today. Fucking savages. |
| ________________________________ [Feb 10,2009 5:41pm - Hater ""] I piss in empty water bottles all day. Cry me a river. |
| __________________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 12:54am - Conservationist ""] I love squeezing out a late night loaf in the server room trashcan. |
| _______________________________ [Feb 11,2009 12:55am - BSV ""] i usually just read the phoenix. |
| _______________________________ [Feb 11,2009 8:37am - Pires ""] all alone with nothing to do but post on rttp. Love shitting at work. It's my pre break ritual. Come here for 15 mins then go on break for a half hour. Go America! |
| __________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 8:55am - scumfuck ""] dertoxia said:There's automatic lights in the bathroom at my work. today i took a shit long enough for the lights to go out halfway through. that happens to me at work all the time, i've learned to bring something to throw out of the stall or text one of my friends here at the risk of getting fucked with. |
| ______________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 9:06am - the_reverend ""] ditto! when playing DS in there, the light went off on me like a billion times. |
| ______________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 9:07am - the_reverend ""] I stand up and wave my arms. |
| __________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 10:12am - c.DeAD ""] the_reverend said:I stand up and wave my arms. I don't know why but that made me laugh. |
| _________________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 11:31am - DestroyYouAlot ""] The morning deuce is an important ritual. |
| _________________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 11:52am - DestroyYouAlot ""] POOPING IN AN EPIC THREAD |
| _____________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 11:54am - W3 @ WORK ""] DestroyYouAlot said:POOPING IN AN EPIC THREAD SHIT ON SHIT OR YOURE AN ASSHOLE |
| _______________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 12:03pm - the_reverend ""] my usual morning is either at 11 or 12:30. I hate going at 12:30 cause I'm using my lunch time to shit. This morning, I got up and in early so I went into the bathroom early. |
| _________________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 12:14pm - DestroyYouAlot ""] U NEED MOAR COFFEE |
| _______________________________________ [Feb 11,2009 12:33pm - the_reverend ""] im currently failing at not shitting during work. my ass is spackled with fail right now. |
| _________________________________________________ [Mar 16,2009 10:24am - Shithouse Philosopher ""] Damn it, over a month with no workplace shits and now I'm in here again. The sound of the ventilation system is kinda soothing though. |
| _______________________________ [Mar 16,2009 10:48am - Yeti ""] "wait.....you changed your name to Latrine?" "yeah....used to be Shithouse" "its a good change...its a good change" |
| _______________________________________ [Mar 16,2009 10:49am - the_reverend ""] I'm in there once or twice a day. my back kills (from being stupid at the gym) so I will probably be in there 3 times today. Why didn't I bring my nintendo ds? |
| _______________________________ [Mar 16,2009 10:50am - Yeti ""] shitting with a sore back is awful. |
| _____________________________________________________ [Mar 18,2009 6:49am - Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho) ""] Don't mind my foot tapping in the stall next door. Sometimes my leg spasms when I'm in here a long time. I often wonder what it's like shitting at the library, anyone know about that? |
| _________________________________________ [Mar 18,2009 8:37am - BobNOMAAMRooney ""] OUTDATED CURRENT EVENTS HUMOR? I FEEL LIKE I AM WATCHING MURPHY BROWN |
| _________________________________________________ [Apr 17,2009 11:41am - Shithouse Philosopher ""] Wow this is a brutal shit. I'm about 15 minutes in. Some guy just ripped some really funny sounding farts at the urinal. |
| _______________________________ [Apr 17,2009 12:39pm - Yeti ""] yesterday i had the worst smelling farts i have ever had in my life. i kept having to turn my fan on because my paperwork was starting to turn yellow. shitting took care of the problem. |
| _______________________________ [Apr 17,2009 12:40pm - Yeti ""] the culprit was dinner from the night before, 6 Harpoon and a whole can of baked beans. |
| _________________________________________ [Apr 17,2009 3:05pm - Yeti's co-worker ""] Dude quit stinking up the office with your rancid, stinky farts. |
| ______________________________ [Apr 17,2009 3:13pm - Yeti ""] fail. no one was in the office when i was doing it. |
| _________________________________________ [Apr 17,2009 4:12pm - Yeti's co-worker ""] Smells like a rotting yak carcass in here right now - that's your brand sucka. |
| __________________________________________________ [Apr 17,2009 4:33pm - Chuck Schuldiner‘s Butt ""] Sometimes, when Chuck was on tour, we'd play a game we called yo-yo, where a rock hard turd would shoot out of his ass on a rope of coagulated jizm, and we'd bounce it around the room before stuffing it in the mouth of a nu-metal fan and forcing him to mount me with a deliciously hesitant anal virgin cock. |
| _____________________________________ [May 4,2009 3:47pm - the_reverend ""] today, one guy put down 4 strips of tp and then a disposable seat cover. overkill much? |
| ______________________________ [May 4,2009 8:25pm - tylor ""] Yeti said:"wait.....you changed your name to Latrine?" "yeah....used to be Shithouse" "its a good change...its a good change" :LOL: |
| ______________________________________ [May 8,2009 10:24am - the_reverend ""] right now, as I type this, I am shitttttttting at work. plop |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 3,2009 10:59am - the_reverend ""] 6 veggie soft tacos and 6 veggie hard tacos last night. im loving the bathroom today! |
| ________________________________________________ [Jun 9,2009 11:40am - Shithouse Philosopher ""] Daaaaaaaaamn. Too much fruit! It's so quiet in here I can hear footsteps on the carpet all the way down the hallway. |
| ________________________________________________ [Feb 9,2010 10:15am - Shithouse Philosopher ""] Nice... got in here first after the cleaning crew. You could eat off the floor in here. |
| _________________________________________________ [Mar 10,2010 10:10am - Shithouse Philosopher ""] Wow this is a brutal one. Should have brought some light reading material like War and Peace or the unabridged dictionary. |
| _________________________________________________ [Sep 29,2010 11:17am - Shithouse Philosopher ""] Well there goes the 6 month no shit at work streak. |
| _______________________________________ [Sep 29,2010 11:20am - the_reverend ""] I'm about to do this in a minute. |
| _____________________________________ [Sep 29,2010 11:22am - arilliusbm ""] the_reverend said:I'm about to do this in a minute. This just gave me a good photosh.... oh wait, nvm. Wasn't me. |
| _______________________________ [Sep 29,2010 3:03pm - sigh ""] We have private restrooms that lock on my floor. Nice place to take a power nap. |
| _________________________________ [Sep 29,2010 3:31pm - sneeze ""] sigh said:We have private restrooms that lock on my floor. Nice place to jack off. fixed |
| _______________________________ [Sep 29,2010 4:29pm - sigh ""] sneeze said: sigh said:We have private restrooms that lock on my floor. Nice place to jack off. fixed Played some Castlevania instead. |
| ________________________________________________ [Nov 30,2011 2:42pm - Shithouse Philosopher ""] FUCKING PINS AND NEEDLES IN MY LEG! Brutal, I'm gonna have to hobble out of here. |
| ___________________________________ [Nov 30,2011 9:40pm - Spaldino ""] i doo doo'd at work today. it sounded like i was watching The Perfect Storm in the theater in there. |
| ___________________________________ [Dec 1,2011 9:57am - Spaldino ""] Coming to work 2 and a half hours early has made me pretty regular. Only at work though. |
| _______________________________________ [Dec 1,2011 10:40am - aaron_michael ""] sinistas said: Fucking savages. I always hear the Clerks quote, "Fucking savages in this town." everytime I see a piss covered seat. Not work related, but I don't give a shit: We were playing near Albany with Tentacles and the venues' toilet was a nightmare without a door. Think Trainspotting. I went next door to the dinner and found their shitter to be more relevant to my evacuation needs. As I'm sitting there, I hear someone come in and hastily run to a stall down the line. The guy sits and then I hear it. The fapping. The furious, beast like fapping. Mother fucker must have been trying to set some kind of world record. I'm still working and fart in the process. Fapping ceases and the guy quickly exits. I finish up and then get a banana thrown at me an hour later. |
| ___________________________________ [Feb 6,2012 12:45pm - arktouros ""] painfully gorged on smoked meat yesterday, always makes for the loudest anal explosions coming out of the bathroom 1 meter away from a quiet study group |
| ___________________________________________ [Feb 6,2012 1:53pm - AndrewBastard NLI ""] i am currently drowning the huxtables. |
| ___________________________________ [Feb 6,2012 1:59pm - Alx_Casket ""] Shithouse%20Philosopher said:FUCKING PINS AND NEEDLES IN MY LEG! Brutal, I'm gonna have to hobble out of here. That's how you know you've given it your all. |
| _________________________________________ [Feb 7,2012 2:06pm - douchebag_patrol ""] PISTACHIO DUMPSICLE WITH CHOCOLATE SPRINKLES OR FALSE |
| ________________________________________________ [Feb 22,2012 3:54pm - Shithouse Philosopher ""] Months and months without a work caca and then: BOOM! Brutal. |
| _______________________________________ [Feb 22,2012 4:09pm - boblovesmusic ""] my coworker just informed me that there's an elderly woman in the upstairs lobby who smells like she shat in her pants... |
| ________________________________________ [Feb 22,2012 4:23pm - DestroyYouAlot ""] This one time, 5 minutes ago? PEANUTS. |
| ________________________________________________ [May 21,2012 1:28pm - Shithouse Philosopher ""] Boom! Shake shake shake the room! |