Heavy Metal Men's Room (Gwar Show)[views:2854][posts:5]___________________________________ [Mar 26,2002 1:24pm - ellzzirk ""] 3/2/02 <br> <br>A room full of bad attitudes. Overpriced beer. Pushy bouncers. A turd on the <br>bathroom floor. <br> <br>I must be in Worcester Mass. <br> <br>Yes, that's how you can identify the lovely cities of Massachusetts. For <br>example, if the urinals appear to be full of orange juice, you're probably in <br>Haverhill. As for the Manray club....oh man let's not even think of that one. <br> <br>Anyway... <br> <br>I was at the Crapadium to see the almighty GWAR. This is one of the best <br>bands on Earth, period. I had seen them once, around 1994 in Boston, with the <br>Dickies. This time around though, they somehow got thrown out to Worcester, <br>which is like a fate worse than death. But no matter, they put on a great <br>show. <br> <br>Opening up were um....Ah who cares? God Forbid is ok. Goat Whore were quite <br>good actually-very 80's thrash influenced. I hear they're some relation to <br>the now-defunct band Acid Bath, but I have no familiarity with them. <br> <br>Gwar always brings out their fair share of enthusiastic fans. This was best <br>summed up by an older man with a positively ancient GWAR shirt who yelled <br>'YEAAAA! GWAAAARRRRR!! ROCCCCKKK MANNN!!! GWARRRR!!' This man then zipped his <br>fly, flushed the urinal, and returned to the part of the club where the show <br>was being held. <br> <br>On that note, I should point out that the Palladium has an asenine no-smoking <br>policy which is broken by...well simply going into the bathroom. All the <br>security does now is yell at people. In fact, last night, I actually heard <br>some of the bouncers telling people 'look just go into the bathroom if you're <br>gonna smoke.' Great, just like school. <br> <br>So as a result, there's always a crowd of semi-inebriated people in there, <br>having what amounts to a 'Heavy metal roundtable' discussion. The combined <br>knowledge of the Worcester Palladium men's room would put most 'respectable' <br>metal magazines and web sites out of business. I read once about a <br>documentary film called 'Heavy Metal Parking Lot', where the subject was <br>interviewing various people at a Judas Priest concert around 1986. Whoever <br>put that thing together needs to make the sequal here. Just watch out for <br>that turd. It may be slithering across the tiles on its own, thanks to the <br>mysterious clear puddles that cover the floor by the end of every show. <br> <br>So GWAR finally comes on around 11. They seem to have stripped down to just <br>the 5 basic members, with a few nameless 'Slave pit' members to assist <br>bringing out various monsters and props. No Slymenstra Hymen, Sexecutioner, <br>Sleazy P Martini or Techno Destructo. This was Gwar 2002, stripped to its <br>bear bones. Well hell, with them putting their real names inside the cd's now <br>and their singer Dave Brockie putting out solo work, I suppose there's no <br>point in keeping the illusion up. <br> <br>The set list seemed to cull heavily from their 'Scumdogs of the Universe' <br>album, which is everyone's favorite for some reason. As for me, I liked 'This <br>Toilet Earth' best but they didn't even play anything from that. Or from <br>'Hell-o!', the first album. I wanted to hear the 'GWAR Theme' and sing along <br>but I suppose maybe next time. They did play a lot of stuff from their newest <br>cd, 'Violence has Arrived', but I haven't gotten around to hearing that one <br>much yet. <br> <br>Ok, that takes care of the music-yes I do care about the music. As for the <br>visual presentation.... <br> <br>GWAR always puts on a hell of a show, featuring giant phoam rubber monsters <br>and a lot of fake blood, urine and other various bodily fluids being sprayed <br>over the crowd. I mean, this is worse than Gallagher-a lot of the Palladium <br>was covered in plastic. I didn't get squirted this time, unlike the 94 show <br>where I came home covered in red and green spooge. Being in Worcester gets <br>you grimey enough though, I suppose. <br> <br>The show featured a number of 'guests', such as Osama Bin Ladin, who was <br>decapitated. President Bush then came out, and talked about his war to 'Rid <br>the world of minorities er um I mean evildoers.' He met a similar fate, as <br>did Mike Tyson, whose gloves were hacked off with an axe, resulting in <br>another stream of fake blood. A newer character was introduced too; Bloody <br>Mary. Mary's phoam rubber breasts shoot blood, and her phoam rubber crotch <br>shotts um...actually I'm not sure what that was. It looked green, but that <br>may have just been the stage lighting. Then came the biggie-Pope John Paul <br>the Whatever was brought out in honor of being so close to the Boston <br>Catholic community. The Pope was cut in half, his intestines laid bare before <br>us all. And then, we got the REAL surprise; the return of GOR GOR. Yes, the <br>crack-addled dinosaur, who made an appearance in time to eat the Pope's <br>entrails and lovingly drool blood and guts over the delighted audience <br>members. GOR GOR then turned on the band, however, and had to be brought down <br>with a sword through his massive head. It was sad to see GOR GOR go, but I <br>suppose it had to be done. (Actually, I've heard a rumor that GOR GOR is <br>actually Mr Snuffalupagus without his furry disguise. That is the meaning of <br>the 4 digit number at the beginning of each Sesame Street episode; the number <br>of children fed to GOR GOR/Snuffy. <br> <br>All in all, I was most impressed, as always. I think I'm one of the few <br>people who actually appreciates GWAR's hunor without taking it at face <br>value-a close examination of some of their lyrics reveals that they're far <br>from a stupid band. In fact, they're somewhat political at times. Further <br>proof of this can be found with their singer's solo album; Dave Brockie <br>Experience's 'Diarrhea of a Mad Man', with a Dead Kennedys-esque logo. That <br>band has toured recently too-I'm gonna look into it next time. Just watch out <br>for that turd. <br> <br> Dev <br> <br> |
| ______________________________________ [Mar 26,2002 1:41pm - the_reverend ""] Someone sent that do me the monday after the show. <br> <br>the weird thing.. I thought the bathrooms were especially clean that day.. I walked in early and went right for them.. and there was no water really on the floor, though there was a guy puking into the trash. |
| ______________________________________ [Mar 26,2002 1:42pm - the_reverend ""] I thought michelle kwan came out too... |
| _________________________________________ [Aug 20,2008 1:07pm - Conservationist ""] If they didn't use real poop, no deal. |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 20,2008 1:19pm - DYA / NLI ""] 666TH VIEW OF THIS AWESOME OLD THREAD FTW GTG BBQ DYA CLONE SIGNING OUT |
| _______________________________ [Aug 20,2008 1:51pm - dftg ""] I was at this show. |