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Craigslist Vol. III: This one is amazing

[views:18298][posts:75]
 __________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 2:41am - nekronaut ""]
linkin park meets metalcore band seeks clean vox (brockton)

Date: 2011-04-04, 8:02AM EDT
Reply to: comm-b9bkh-2304106881@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

Our band is made up of a emmure/metalcore screamer...a sick rapper who wrights sick lyrics(not about guns,booty,money, and stupid shit)...two different style bassist....a metal/hard rock guitarist and a hardcore/metal/rap drummer....we need clean voxs to finish our line up....we have a studio in brockton and play 3 nights a week...we are looking for a male or female hard rock style vocalist....for more info email me back or for a fast response text my cell 3399331119

Location: brockton
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 2304106881


:doublehorns::shocker::doublehorns:
 _________________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 2:45am - douchebag_patrol ""]
http://worcester.craigslist.org/muc/2268511556.html

metal manager seeks bands (worcester)
Date: 2011-03-16, 11:31AM EDT
Reply to: comm-9kuym-2268511556@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

I'm 19 and have been in the business all my life. I know what it takes to make it big, and have connections with all the best venues and promoters in the area. While I'm not a very good musician I know how to talk to people and represent my clients so that they get the best bang for there buck. I'm also an excellent motivator and know how to whip lazy musicians into shape. I really love being part of the scene and this is the best way for me to make a difference given my lack of musical talent. My fees are reasonable especially given my experience and networking skills. If your band needs that extra push to get out of the basement I'm your man.

* Location: worcester
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2268511556
 __________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 2:47am - AMOROK666 ""]
Mother of god.....
 _________________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 2:47am - douchebag_patrol ""]
http://worcester.craigslist.org/muc/2268418499.html

LYRICIST SEEKS BLACK METAL BAND (Auburn)
Date: 2011-03-16, 10:46AM EDT
Reply to: comm-9f469-2268418499@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

I've got the poetry I just need the band! I'm a 20 Year old lyricist seeking black metallers to collaborate with. Some of my favorite artists at the moment are Woe and Agalloch, and my lyrical themes run from angst and depression, to all the shit going on in the world, to liberal politics (none of that satan nonsense). I live outside Worcester and don't have a car, but I would be willing to work via e-mail unless someone could pick me up. Get at me!

* Location: Auburn
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2268418499
 _______________________________
[Apr 6,2011 9:42am - xmikex ""]
Apparently Brockton is the place to be these days for poorly articulated bro-rock.
 _______________________________
[Apr 6,2011 9:44am - xmikex ""]

douchebag_patrol said:my lyrical themes run from angst and depression, to all the shit going on in the world, to liberal politics (none of that satan nonsense). I live outside Worcester and don't have a car, but I would be willing to work via e-mail unless someone could pick me up. Get at me!


Liberal politics, and work via email. Only black metal practice via skype ist tr00.
 ___________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 10:07am - dreadkill ""]
carl cheddarsmooth needs to intervene and get that 19 year old off his turf
 __________________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 10:07am - largefreakatzero ""]
Hopefully all of these retards wrap their lowered v-techs around large trees at high speed to save the world from future sonic atrocities.
 __________________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 10:11am - largefreakatzero ""]

dreadkill said:carl cheddarsmooth needs to intervene and get that 19 year old off his turf


That post totally read like an MSD trolling effort -- I was expecting to see Carl Cheddarsmooth's nombre on that. Mike should totally start a turf war with that fucking kid.
 __________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 11:43am - sethrich ""]

nekronaut said:text my cell 3399331119


Too many numbers that is :yoda:
 _______________________________
[Apr 6,2011 11:56am - boxxy ""]
at least the lyricist doesn't claim that:
"I'm 19 and have been in the business all my life. I know what it takes to make it big, and have connections with all the best venues and promoters in the area. While I'm not a very good musician I know how to talk to people and represent my clients so that they get the best bang for there buck. I'm also an excellent motivator and know how to whip lazy musicians into shape."

How the holy fucking crap has this kid "been in the business" his whole life. Does he mean "his whole adult life? (aka 1year) What a dink, there is no fucking way some 19year old kid has connections in all of the 21plus clubs in MA, how would he? He can't get in them! What a jerk.

The lyricist is funny, i wonder what made him want his poetry to be the lryics for black metal..

The band just sounds aweful. 2 singers already, and they want one more? Two bass players.... but only one guitar player.
 ________________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 12:01pm - DestroyYouAlot ""]

douchebag_patrol said:http://worcester.craigslist.org/muc/2268418499.html

LYRICIST SEEKS BLACK METAL BAND (Auburn)
Date: 2011-03-16, 10:46AM EDT
Reply to: comm-9f469-2268418499@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

I've got the poetry I just need the band! I'm a 20 Year old lyricist seeking black metallers to collaborate with. Some of my favorite artists at the moment are Woe and Agalloch, and my lyrical themes run from angst and depression, to all the shit going on in the world, to liberal politics (none of that satan nonsense). I live outside Worcester and don't have a car, but I would be willing to work via e-mail unless someone could pick me up. Get at me!

* Location: Auburn
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2268418499



This kid would make excellent blow-in insulation for the roof, if properly curfed and dehydrated before being run through the chipper.


boxxy said:at least the lyricist doesn't claim that:
"I'm 19 and have been in the business all my life. I know what it takes to make it big, and have connections with all the best venues and promoters in the area. While I'm not a very good musician I know how to talk to people and represent my clients so that they get the best bang for there buck. I'm also an excellent motivator and know how to whip lazy musicians into shape."

How the holy fucking crap has this kid "been in the business" his whole life. Does he mean "his whole adult life? (aka 1year) What a dink, there is no fucking way some 19year old kid has connections in all of the 21plus clubs in MA, how would he? He can't get in them! What a jerk.



[img]
 _________________________________
[Apr 6,2011 12:02pm - Doomkid ""]

largefreakatzero said:
dreadkill said:carl cheddarsmooth needs to intervene and get that 19 year old off his turf


That post totally read like an MSD trolling effort -- I was expecting to see Carl Cheddarsmooth's nombre on that. Mike should totally start a turf war with that fucking kid.



Are we sure that MSD didn't just cause Cheddarsmooth to spontaneously incarnate?
 ________________________________________
[Jul 30,2011 1:38pm - josh_hates_you ""]
http://boston.craigslist.org/nos/muc/2513194594.html

 _______________________________
[Jul 30,2011 1:55pm - Pires ""]

josh_hates_you said:http://boston.craigslist.org/nos/muc/2513194594.html






bennyhillifier


I seriously thought this was a female...I was way off...
 ___________________________________
[Jul 30,2011 2:01pm - nekronaut ""]
WOULD.
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[Jul 30,2011 2:43pm - ArrowHeadNLI ""]
What the FUCK?
 ______________________________________
[Jul 30,2011 3:20pm - ArrowHeadNLI ""]
Homeschooled:

Proof that getting beat up in school for doing stupid shit is a CRUCIAL part of growing up.
 ____________________________________
[Jul 30,2011 5:26pm - LucidCurse ""]
worst.
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[Jul 30,2011 5:49pm - bloblovesmusic  ""]
Holy shit that's awful. also, NO YOU ARE NOT GLAM METAL! YOU'RE CRAP!
 __________________________________________
[Jul 30,2011 6:27pm - douchebag_patrol ""]
http://worcester.craigslist.org/m4w/2511521415.html

Looking for someone to be with... - 24 (Uxbridge)

Date: 2011-07-24, 10:42PM EDT
Reply to:
Reply To This Post
[Errors when replying to ads?]

Ok, I'm going to put myself out there and pray to God that someone answers. Basically, I got out of a relationship about...hmm lets see now. I believe it was back in August of 08'. Long time ago huh? Thing is, this girl still has my heart, and it shouldn't be that way. We broke up, and for the longest time I couldn't be her friend. It was just too painful. Eventually, it got easier and we got together as friends occasionally. About two weeks ago, my friends, her, and me all hung out together. It was this time that she met one of my other friends.
This particular friend doesn't exactly have the best luck with women. His longest relationship was 2 months I believe. He's basically all about getting whatever women he can and can never seem to hold on to a girl for more than a week. I'm probably being really harsh, cuz he really is a good guy, just not the best person to have a relationship with. He's a good friend and all that. The reason I'm being so harsh is because I'm not exactly tickled with him right now. Sorry I'm rambling. Anyways, so that event gets over, and she asks me that night if I thought my friend(we'll call him Dan) was hitting on her. I said no and nothing more was said.
A week later me, her, one of my other friends, and Dan were all hanging out and decided to go for a walk. The entire time, Dan and her were together, holding hands, and basically inseperable. At the time, I wrote it off as him just guiding her(btw, she's blind, so it's a common occurance) but looking back, it was more than that. After the walk, we stopped to eat at a local pizza joint and that's when Dan dropped the bomb that her and my ex were dating.
I was sort of expecting it, but it was a shocker no less. Ever since I've essentially felt like i've been punched in the stomach and stabbed in the back repeatedly, especially since Dan had assured me before that he didn't date his friends exes, and she had assured me that she wasn't into him like that. I realized that they were both full of shit and I obviously couldn't trust them.

I'm sorry if this story bored you, but I'm just trying to let you know what's going on in my life if you decide to pursue a relationship with me. I'm looking for someone who can show me that she's the one for me and to prove to me that all this bullshit happened for a reason. My parents never really liked this girl after she led me on and stuff, and I'm hurt too, but at the same time I still have feelings for her and it drives me nuts. I know she's not "the one" and I know there are better people out there, but I just can't move on. I want someone who can help me with this. I need someone to help me move on and realize that there are "better fish in the sea." I've nowhere else to turn. If any of this sounds like something you could help with, email me and we can talk further.

As far as preferences, I'm not too picky, here are just a few perks:
-I prefer girls that are more on the petite side(since i'm only 5'5" and I know a lot of girls prefer taller men)
-A lot of energy/bubbly personality is always a plus
-Hopefully you live within 20 minutes of me
-Enjoys metal/hardcore music
-Doesn't smoke or do drugs(this is the only one I insist on. If you're a smoker, or 420 friendly or anything like that please look elsewhere)
-That's about it.
Also, please put "help" in the subject so I know you're not spam. Thanks.

Location: Uxbridge
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
 __________________________________________
[Jul 30,2011 6:37pm - douchebag_patrol ""]
http://worcester.craigslist.org/cas/2489192661.html

looking for cute alt/emo girl for cuddle/playing buddy - m4w - 20 (worcester)

Date: 2011-07-11, 6:34PM EDT
Reply to:
Reply To This Post
[Errors when replying to ads?]

im looking for a cute alt/emo/scene/metal girl who'd like to have a little bit of innocent fun. im into alot of things. i like rough sex, scratches bleeding choking and all that. i dont have too much of a preference, pics not needed im not shallow. all id like is you to be in shape at least. id prefer an email or two back n forth then a phone call to get comfortable and then we can meet up.

if your interested email me=]

Location: worcester



http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/msr/2515347449.html

fun guy seeks fwb - m4w - 36 (somerville)

Date: 2011-07-26, 11:21PM EDT
Reply to:
Reply To This Post
[Errors when replying to ads?]

Hi, i am 6'0 200 lbs 8 inch cock, and i can eat pussy for hours.i listen to heavy metal but can appreciate most styles as well i am looking for a fun horny woman to become friends with, and have a great sexual time, sex, oral, no drama, no headgames, i am open to age and race, all iask is be for real i just want a fun time no relationship crap and the headaches that comes with it lol lets e-mail first then we can talk on the phone, and meet somewhere for a drink, then go from there





Location: somerville
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

[img]




http://hartford.craigslist.org/cas/2489802902.html


slutty girl for nsa fun - w4m (Hartford)

Date: 2011-07-12, 5:32AM EDT
Reply to:
Reply To This Post
[Errors when replying to ads?]

Hobbies- grooming my crotch hairs, touchin, suckin, ****in****Goals- to pls my vagina.Myself- i like sex just as much as a dude does, i like Jamaican showers, and long walks on the beach.Music- death metal.

Location: Hartford
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 2489802902
 _________________________________________
[Jul 30,2011 6:52pm - Headbanging_Man ""]
I love emmure-core, it's my favorite genre!
 ____________________________________
[Jul 30,2011 11:30pm - Lamp nli  ""]
Now these are the kinds of Craigslist ads people should be posting on here!
 _____________________________________
[Aug 1,2011 2:39pm - killer orka  ""]
http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/muc/2521620732.html

Our singer acted like a lunatic towards our Bass player, who is the most chill and humble person ever, so we, bass and both guitars, are striking out on our own. We have a show booked on the 18th. The singer didn't book it, I did, so even though the band name is hers, she will not be welcome at that show. We will have a new name within the next few days. I (guitar) will be handling vocals from here on out. Our drummer will hopefully join us, but he's very much attached to the singer for a place to live so we don't believe we can have full faith that he'll be on board with us. We need a drummer for this show.

Style is eclectic metal leaning strongly towards true Thrash (i.e. Megadeth, not Municipal Waste or some shred garbage). The setlist for the show is as follows: Megadeth - Symphony Of Destruction, Judas Priest - Tyrant, an 8:00min+ original tune of ours with a very Angel Witch meets Slayer vibe, Bathory - A Fine Day To Die, Iron Maiden - Charlotte The Harlot and closing with Angel Witch by Angel Witch. We chose these songs upon deciding to ditch the crazy singer primarily for their simplicity because we have such a short window of time to practice with you for this show. If you choose to stay with us after this show, we will be playing mostly originals with a Megadeth, Angel Witch, Evile and Xentrix type feel to them.

We are very serious metalheads, not into new school crossover thrash at all. We take metal seriously and never play joke songs. We don't think there's anything funny about metal. We're here to make a real musical statement that real thrash is back. This is not beer and razors type thrash at all. We are the real deal.

If you have your own kit, are available in Boston the evening of August 18th and can play these songs please contact me immediately.

P.S. We wouldn't normally play so many covers, as we actually had 4 originals with the only cover tune being Tyrant, but the lyrics to those songs belong to the singer, and none of us like the tunes at all. I saw this bullshit coming from her (since metal chicks are so often lunatics, especially the poser ones) and deliberately wrote songs with extremely simple, cliché and perhaps even borderline poser riffs, just in case she flipped out, which she has. So we are letting her take those three other songs, because if she tries to play them without us she will probably either get laughed at, or get popular with hipsters because those ironic bastards have no taste.

 __________________________________________
[Aug 1,2011 2:47pm - FuckIsMySignature ""]
TL;DR
 ________________________________
[Aug 1,2011 2:51pm - Mark R  ""]
Someone should fill in for those kids. Is that your band?
 ________________________________
[Aug 1,2011 2:55pm - Doomkid ""]
We are very serious metalheads, not into new school crossover thrash at all. We take metal seriously and never play joke songs. We don't think there's anything funny about metal. We're here to make a real musical statement that real thrash is back. This is not beer and razors type thrash at all. We are the real deal.


I saw this bullshit coming from her (since metal chicks are so often lunatics, especially the poser ones) and deliberately wrote songs with extremely simple, cliché and perhaps even borderline poser riffs,


Writing shitty songs because you have a passive-aggressive relationship with your ex-singer? WE ARE DEAD FUCKING SERIOUS.
 ______________________________
[Aug 1,2011 3:05pm - Mutis ""]
Metalheads who take metal seriously are posers.
 __________________________________________
[Aug 1,2011 3:08pm - FuckIsMySignature ""]
The only thing that should be taken seriously is good songwriting/composition and proper use of finances. Everything else should be party time excellent.
 _________________________________________
[Aug 1,2011 3:11pm - largefreakatzero ""]
More kids should explore this before having mommy/daddy buy them instruments: http://www.findmeahobby.com/

There are plenty of fulfilling pastimes out there, there's no need to engage in sound pollution.
 _____________________________
[Aug 1,2011 3:21pm - Yeti ""]

douchebag_patrol said:http://worcester.craigslist.org/muc/2268418499.html

LYRICIST SEEKS BLACK METAL BAND (Auburn)
Date: 2011-03-16, 10:46AM EDT
Reply to: comm-9f469-2268418499@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

I've got the poetry I just need the band! I'm a 20 Year old lyricist seeking black metallers to collaborate with. Some of my favorite artists at the moment are Woe and Agalloch, and my lyrical themes run from angst and depression, to all the shit going on in the world, to liberal politics (none of that satan nonsense). I live outside Worcester and don't have a car, but I would be willing to work via e-mail unless someone could pick me up. Get at me!

* Location: Auburn
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2268418499



AUBURN??!! get out of my town you bastard!
 _________________________________________
[Aug 1,2011 8:44pm - douchebag_patrol ""]
[img]
[img]
 __________________________________
[Aug 2,2011 8:29pm - dreadkill ""]
http://boston.craigslist.org/sob/muc/2526617254.html
 ________________________________________
[Aug 3,2011 8:45am - trollmagetiton  ""]

Yeti said:
douchebag_patrol said:http://worcester.craigslist.org/muc/2268418499.html

LYRICIST SEEKS BLACK METAL BAND (Auburn)
Date: 2011-03-16, 10:46AM EDT
Reply to: comm-9f469-2268418499@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

I've got the poetry I just need the band! I'm a 20 Year old lyricist seeking black metallers to collaborate with. Some of my favorite artists at the moment are Woe and Agalloch, and my lyrical themes run from angst and depression, to all the shit going on in the world, to liberal politics (none of that satan nonsense). I live outside Worcester and don't have a car, but I would be willing to work via e-mail unless someone could pick me up. Get at me!

* Location: Auburn
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2268418499



AUBURN??!! get out of my town you bastard!

Seriously people. If you notice this ridiculous post, along with the 19 year old manager were made on the same day right around the time cheddah was trollin that douche kid. I think it is time to open your eyes to the fact that rttp trolls might be expanding their reach for the laughs!
 ___________________________________
[Aug 3,2011 8:49am - RichHorror ""]

FuckIsMySignature said:proper use of finances.


[img]
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[Oct 20,2011 2:03pm - Johnny 5  ""]
http://providence.craigslist.org/muc/2647937476.html

brutal death metal/anoxia (ri, ma)

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Date: 2011-10-13, 2:26PM EDT
Reply to: comm-jrkqg-2647937476@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
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Hi I'm looking to restart up anoxia with some fresh new members, looking for people that can play technical and fast, I'm the original singer and need all, meaning guitarist, bass and drums. if you are not familair with the band , google anoxia usa death metalor anoxia intense killings to check it out. leave me your contact and something to where I can check out, to see if you can play our music, and I'll get back to you.


•Location: ri, ma
•it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2647937476

 _______________________________________
[Oct 20,2011 2:20pm - JOHNNY CINCO  ""]

Johnny%205 said:http://providence.craigslist.org/muc/2647937476.html

brutal death metal/anoxia (ri, ma)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2011-10-13, 2:26PM EDT
Reply to: comm-jrkqg-2647937476@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
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Hi I'm looking to restart up anoxia with some fresh new members, looking for people that can play technical and fast, I'm the original singer and need all, meaning guitarist, bass and drums. if you are not familair with the band , google anoxia usa death metalor anoxia intense killings to check it out. leave me your contact and something to where I can check out, to see if you can play our music, and I'll get back to you.


•Location: ri, ma
•it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2647937476


:shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::shocker::middlefinger:
 __________________________________
[Oct 20,2011 4:41pm - Samantha ""]
I dare someone to try out for this band... Carl Cheddarsmooth? Where are you?


http://worcester.craigslist.org/muc/2626652433.html

vocals looking 4 hard rock/heavy metal musician to start career wth (lecister,worcester,spencer areas )

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Date: 2011-10-01, 6:01AM EDT
Reply to: comm-fkkrm-2626652433@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
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Ok hello there I'm Justin a vocalist of 2 male and female looking to do heavy metal/very hard rock/and hard acoustic(slipknot acoustic). Our influences are All that remains,As I lay dying,lacona coil,KoRn,Adema,Slipknot,stone sour,Seether,Evenecence,Flyleaf,Metallica,Three days grace,Cradle of filth,Dir en grey,big lamb of god fan,Trivium,ozzy,Dio,A7x,H.I.M,Vespers,And five finger death punch the list keeps going just don't wanted to give u the basics.I write my own lyrics just need the music have a syth player need 2 guitarists a bassist,and a drummer that can do double bass kicks I might have 1 guitarist that's in so yeah need everyone I don't have a practice spot that would be nice but if all members can chip in we possibly can rent a space there easy to find but rather do it at a homebase bands seem to make it like that quicker lol! We r very easy to work with versital and bendable would love to add everyones style in to one genre that's awsome and very headbangish and new we will be singing also both and there will be screaming those 2 things r what are important cause the female singer can't scream at all but can sing just like Amy Lee and laci from flyleaf very beautiful she will be doing operatic on metal and singing on hard rock style we also want acoustic songs also with electric guitar added to it. We hope to hear from u all I believe that if we focus and work hard we will make not to have a ego but I do know that people will enjoy my voice and hers and I know that u guys will be loved by the crowd if u put ur heart into it I've been told that I have a very nice male voice and a awsome scream my partner has a beautiful voice and has been in a few bands that r metal and rock and if ur just a band looking for vocalist and song writers we r a great candidate are willing to be flexibile if interested plz call or text Justin at 774-242-6873 or Sam at 508-963-1130 thx and hope to hear from you all we are age 23 me and Samantha is 21 so getting in to over 21 places wont be a problem we are looking to go all the way concerts t-shirts cds albums the work so if u wanna make a living out of this here we are ready and waiting lol ok later

Justin&Samantha

• Location: lecister,worcester,spencer areas
•it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests









PostingID: 2626652433
 _______________________________________
[Oct 20,2011 4:43pm - hauptpflucker ""]
A vocalist of 2 male and female? Slipknot Acoustic? Wuuuuut?
 ________________________________
[Oct 20,2011 4:47pm - burnsy ""]
He was raised by two daddies and a maid. Duh...
 _________________________________________________________
[Nov 5,2011 10:58am - Guess Who? no seriously guess!  ""]
http://worcester.craigslist.org/muc/2678365025.html


Progressive Metal Drummer looking for a band (Worcester)

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Date: 2011-10-31, 3:20PM EDT
Reply to: comm-zvmqy-2678365025@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
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My name is Bobby. I recently moved to worcester and am currently looking for a band. I have been playing for over 12 years now. I can play just about anything besides Jazz, or any kind of latin, cuban, african that sort of thing. I studied at Berklee, music composition/ drumming.
My influences, or rather things that i have played along to since being a kid would be:
Guns N' Roses, Megadeth, Metallica, Judas Priest (Painkiller), Slipknot (first cd), Mudvayne (first cd), Korn (first cd), Limp Bizkit (first cd), Fear Factory, Machine Head, Pissing Razors, Mansons Anti-Christ cd, Soilwork, Pantera, Chimaira, To-mera anything along those lines.
My biggest Influence is Dream Theater.
I would prefer a band that is going for a range of musical styles, but metal being the main style. Technicality equaling Dream Theater, but just more metal. I don't want to be just like Dream Theater because they are not metal enough. I get all the time, "you want to be dream theater" i am a super fan, but again, they are just not metal enough. I love the technicality and time signatures, and the moving of the music. Hopefully the band i was to be in could at least put in the instrumental stuff they do.
The one thing i do not do is crazy fast, blast beats, or non stop double bass. With blast beats, if i used them it would be more of a fill kinda thing.
If this sounds like you or your band send me an e-mail.
The last thing, as of now i have no job, i'm currently looking so if anyone knows anybody thats hiring that would be cool to me know also. I don't own a car here either, my van flooded the week before I came up here back in Texas.


 ___________________________________________
[Nov 5,2011 11:01am - FuckIsMySignature ""]
progmetaldrummer?
 ______________________________
[Nov 5,2011 11:15am - Lamp ""]
On Craigslist, he's just another run of the mill dink, yet when he tried to come on here it was so embarassingly bad...
 ___________________________________________
[Nov 5,2011 11:18am - FuckIsMySignature ""]
returntothefail
 _________________________________________
[Nov 5,2011 11:24am - ding ding ding  ""]
[img]
 ______________________________
[Nov 5,2011 11:29am - Lamp ""]
This is not the most interesting ad in the world, but hey, it is in my town...

http://providence.craigslist.org/muc/2685597989.html

new band looking for drums and guitars (warwick)
Date: 2011-11-04, 5:19PM EDT
Reply to: pattheguitarist@yahoo.com [Errors when replying to ads?]
hey my names pat i started a band not to long ago its gonna be a metal band our influence is mainly dance gavin dance but so far we are consisted of a bassist and vocalist we want at least two guitarists and a drummer we will practice out of my basement and practice about 1-2 times a week so please hmu we are from 18-20 yrs old

Location: warwick
it's ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
 ______________________________
[Nov 5,2011 11:35am - Lamp ""]
http://providence.craigslist.org/muc/2682194484.html

bassist needed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (warwick/providence/cranston area)
Date: 2011-11-02, 6:38PM EDT
Reply to: hughesmla@yahoo.com [Errors when replying to ads?]
hey wats up fellow bassist me and my friend are currently in work of making a raw punk/hardcore band with a touch of southern metal to it.
my name is matt and im the vocalist . were both driven to turn this into a full time career , we have a drummer also so we just need a bassist .
we have equipment and a place to practice. Our influences are Gallows , every time i die , maylene and the sons of disaster , horse the band , falling in reverse , vanna , norma jean , underoath etc
if you have passion and wants to make it , contact me 401-921-6294 ask for matt or email me hughesmla@yahoo.com

Location: warwick/providence/cranston area
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 2682194484



A full time career you say? I mean after all, when I think of raw punk, I think of Norma Jean, man.
 ___________________________________________
[Nov 5,2011 11:35am - FuckIsMySignature ""]
dance gavin dance? thats a band name?


sigh.
 ______________________________
[Nov 5,2011 11:57am - Lamp ""]
I just watched the video of the black lipstick shemale up above for the first time... HOLY WHAT THE FUCK, that is next level fail!
 __________________________________
[Dec 6,2011 7:47pm - nekronaut ""]
NORTH SHORE AMERICAN METAL BAND MEMBERS WANTED
Date: 2011-12-04, 10:51PM EST
Reply to: Reverendtholemew@yahoo.com[ Errors when replying to ads?]

NORTH SHORE METAL BAND NEEDS MEMBERS!

Me and my friend Jon are starting a pure American metal band. . . and we need some other members ASAP. We have both been playin for about five years now. I play the drums and he's the lead guitarist. Were not lookin for people to"jam" with though. . . were looking for people who are as dedicated to music as we are, and that are serious about startin a band. One day we wanna make a career out of music, and we wanna be remembered for what we do.

What we are NOT looking for. . .
Young kids who think Metallica is the greatest band that ever played the big stage
People who are gonna play for 45 minutes with us and then never come back because they don't GAF
People who CANT PLAY
A person who won't show up to practice, and won't contribute. . .a band is an effort from everyone whether you play guitar, bass, sing, or manage. . . everyone needs to play a role.

What we ARE looking for. . . A bass player (preferably 17-early 20's).
A lead singer (preferably 17-early 20's). . . squeals are okay here and there.. but we don't want our image to be all scene bullshit.
A rhythm guitarist (preferably 17-early 20's).

We have a spot where we can practice in Wakefield called Jamspot. It's a pretty sick place they have bass amps, guitar amps, mic's and all that stuff. . . you just need to bring your own guitar/bass.

Practice would probably be 2-3 times a week down there. ..its 25$ an hour or 27$ if we want to record.. and split between 4 or 5 people it's not bad at all.

If your serious and want to actually get going, send me an email at Reverendtholemew@yahoo.com..

Ill respond to you within a day and we can set something up.

Thanks guys, Jon&Joe
 _______________________________
[Dec 6,2011 8:00pm - Mark_R ""]
^ this one doesn't strike me as being too bad. Only big eyebrow raiser is the e-mail address.
 ______________________________
[Dec 6,2011 10:06pm - Lamp ""]
The "career out of music" part is more than an eyebrow raiser and the fact that there were no influences listed whatsoever is as well.
 _______________________________________
[Dec 7,2011 2:53am - josh_hates_you ""]
Singing Airline Pilot seeks Big Band or Combo (Providence/Boston)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2011-12-05, 10:59AM EST
Reply to: comm-exntr-2736878055@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My name is Charlie Cockpit, The Singing Airline Pilot.
I believe that America needs cheering up and my goal is to travel to every city in the USA to help build moral and to re-introduce songs from "crooners" like Nat King Cole, Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and other American Standard Music icons to the youth of America. I've been singing on the streets of Boston, Providence, Hartford, New Haven and even made my to Wall Street in NYC to try to cheer up the folks demonstrating there.
Obviously I sing to instrumental tracks for my "street" performances, but my "BIG" dream is to put together a big band to back me up for live events.
In reality, I realize what I really need, is a fun-loving, fantastic combo to back me up on songs from The American Standards for live events.
If you feel like making the world a happier place through music and want to join me in cheering up the USA, please e-mail me.

Here is a FOX-TV Providence News Story:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1WdvlSfx3is

Here is the WPRO-Dan Yorke Show Interview:
http://630wpro.com/Article.asp?id=2321977&spid=37719

Here is an article from The PINK Paper:
http://news.pinkpaper.com/NewsStory/6306/2...ilot-aims-to-cheer-up-america-.aspx

Charlie Cockpit, The Singing Airline Pilot
www.charliecockpit.com


•Location: Providence/Boston
•it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

[img]
[img]
 ______________________________
[Dec 10,2011 2:34am - Lamp ""]
http://providence.craigslist.org/muc/2745165489.html

Complete Douchebag................ (eastside of Provodense)
Date: 2011-12-09, 7:07PM EST
Reply to: comm-davbq-2745165489@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Complete douchebag looking for other (partial, or complete) douchebags to form a "Band of Douchebags".
Jaded, sarcastic, borderline personalities encouraged to apply.
I've just turned 50 and feel the urge to harass the shit out of
a room full of drunks with twisted, distorted versions of the usual
60's, 70's classic hits that drunks tend to stumble to (are you getting the picture?).
Think "Captain Beefheart/Bonzo Doo Dah Dog Band/Rutles/Mid-Seventies Rolling Stones,etc...
I need to hit the sack by 7:30 pm, so rehearsals can only be between 4:00 and 5:00 pm....or am......
doesn't matter to me.... as long as I'm in the sack by 7:30 pm!!
If you've got rehearsal space, wheels to pick me up, and a reliable supply of painkillers and good pot,
by all means, feel free to RSVP 'cause I'm ready to ROCK!! and shit.



Location: eastside of Provodense
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
 ________________________________
[Dec 10,2011 6:22pm - burnsy ""]
http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/van/muc/2717996714.html

 ___________________________________
[Dec 15,2011 5:17pm - Katatonic ""]
http://worcester.craigslist.org/muc/2721728860.html

Looking for a passionate drummer and bassist for new band (North Central MA)
Date: 2011-12-15, 12:46AM EST
Reply to: comm-h2wan-2721728860@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
I am Brett, a singer/songwriter who has had the passion for music since the age of 4. I am now 25, and I feel that I have kept my talents to myself for long enough. I rarely have played out (about twice a year) even though I am asked to play several times a month by the people that have heard me. I simply wasn't ready.

It's time to break out of these walls and go further than most people ever have. If you have the same passion for music as I do, and the same goals, I want you to join me.

Recently I have met a fantastic guitarist. We have a great place to get together and jam for free once a week (along with very secure storage). We are brand new to the scene with fresh minds and are looking to start a band.

I'm looking for a drummer and a bassist within 20 miles of north-central Massachusetts who:

* Has more passion for music than anything else (aside from family/friends)
* Won't stop at any roadblock, no matter how difficult it gets. Understand that everyone starts small and grows to the point of what you set your mind to. There are no limits.
* Doesn't dwell on criticism
* Sees every jam/practice session or gig as something you set other things aside for.
* Can play by ear (Reading sheets is a plus but not required)
* Seeks to be creative rather than playing covers all the time
* Is willing to learn any instrument thrown at them just because it's fun
* Can sing on key (no worries about the quality -- we'll improve on it as a band)
* Have written at least one original song (with or without lyrics)
* Is between the ages of 17 and 27 (Not trying to discriminate -- I just want to be in a band that performs for many, many years together; music is your life)
* Is a gentleman (Again, not trying to discriminate -- I feel that a girl's voice would not fit in our style of music)
* Enjoy playing the style of at least a few of the following musicians: Coldplay (huge plus), The Beatles (another huge plus), Radiohead, Muse, Fleetwood Mac, U2, Kings of Leon, Two Door Cinema Club, Train, Empire of the Sun, MGMT, Miami Horror. In other words, no screamo/hardcore.
* Doesn't give a shit about possibly becoming the next band to have an audience of 40-year-old virgins
* Cares about his appearance (we are going to look like gentlemen, who bathe properly and smell damn good)
* Doesn't smoke or do drugs, or have an alcohol addiction
* Most importantly, wants to make a living of this. We shall live the dream. We will be famous around the world, and we will share our love for music with people of all generations. This is no joke.

We will be a band for many audiences with a clean, unique image. We write our own music; the style of which will be a blend of alternative rock and power ballads with the use of dreamy guitars/keys yet powerful drums. Not every song will have drums, or pianos, or guitars, which is why I would like us to be able to learn other instruments as we grow.


If I just described you, we need to talk ASAP. You're exactly what I'm looking for. Email me!

Location: North Central MA
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2721728860
 ______________________________
[Dec 15,2011 5:26pm - Yeti ""]
ah nice, i'm in. oh wait, i don't smell very good at all.
 ______________________________
[Dec 15,2011 5:37pm - Lamp ""]
I'd pay good money to see Lemmy roast this guy in a pig cooker.
 ___________________________________
[Dec 15,2011 6:01pm - Katatonic ""]
"Doesn't give a shit about possibly becoming the next band to have an audience of 40-year-old virgins"

I am not sure I understand this
 _____________________________________
[Dec 15,2011 10:53pm - Fake ARIL  ""]

Katatonic said:"Doesn't give a shit about possibly becoming the next band to have an audience of 40-year-old virgins"

I am not sure I understand this



He means that you have to like Rush.
 ___________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 1:44am - Katatonic ""]
http://worcester.craigslist.org/muc/2768225833.html


hey im justin i need a drummer for our band we are have2 vocalist male and female we scream and sing. We have two guitarist and a bassist. Both have 10 to 15 yrs exp.and they play grunge old andnew,rock,hard rock,soft metal,and grungemetal. And the bassist has 5yr.exp.in punk,rock,hardcore,metal,and hard rock so hes good. just so we are clear we want to go all the way concerts,t-shirts,touring,record deals,the works we are not interested in just jammin so if that's what your looking for please do not respond. Were pretty laid back but pretty serius about what we want to do we practice twice or once a week it verys also we are a democracy band so everyone get a voice on how a song is played no one is a leader or a boss of the band . If there is no bassist out there we will except a guitarist tuned low or a pedle that sounds low so yeah our ages range from 15-33 so we are looking for people ages 16 to 35 but must like current rock to metal and be able to pla both so we are accualy trying o be all around so if interested please call at 5089638704 or 5089638687 or the guitarist brian at 5087697006 so yeah hope to here from you all thx and laters

Justin
 _______________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 8:30am - AndrewBastard ""]
someone needs to holla-daddy these kids in real life...

hidden camera/mic...dress the part and show up for an audition. would be so good.
 _______________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 8:30am - AndrewBastard ""]
its could be a reality comedy series...Craigs List Trolls
 _____________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 8:42am - Randy_Marsh ""]
Lol at using a low tuned guitar as a bass..,

GO BUY A BASS YOU FUCKING SUBURBAN NERD
 _______________________________
[Dec 29,2011 9:26am - Pires ""]
My favorite is "ages range from 15-33". I'd love to meet the 33 year old who's in a band with 15 year olds and actually brags about it.
 ___________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 9:55am - Katatonic ""]
^ I loved that too. I also loved that no one was the "boss of the band".
 _______________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 9:58am - AndrewBastard ""]
I was gonna comment on that age gap but PanzerBastards youngest is 27 and KPanzer is 43 so its almost the same age gap...

granted 15 years old is still a KID so a 33 year old shouldnt be in the band with someone that age...
 ________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 10:13am - Pires ""]
Wait a minute... First part of the paragraph he mentions he has a bassist with 5 years experience playing shitty music. Second part, he says if no bassist replies, he would "except" a guitarist that tunes low. I thought the ad was for a drummer??

Looks like we have all been trolled by OP Paul.
 ___________________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 10:32am - largefreakatzero ""]

AndrewBastard said:
granted 15 years old is still a KID so a 33 year old shouldnt be in the band with someone that age...



Unless the 33 yo is looking for some hot nubile sexxors.
 _______________________________
[Dec 29,2011 10:37am - Yeti ""]
the saddest part of all, i am willing to bet that the 33 year old in the band is the one who composed that stunning grammar display.
 ________________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 10:40am - AndrewBastard ""]
unfortunately thats probably true.
 ____________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 10:44am - Katatonic ""]
"soft metal"
 _______________________________
[Dec 29,2011 10:48am - Yeti ""]
Malleable Metal.
 _________________________________
[Dec 29,2011 10:54am - burnsy ""]
Magic 106.667 - Playing the latest and greatest soft metal.
 _______________________________
[Jan 26,2013 6:36pm - LULZ  ""]
http://worcester.craigslist.org/tlg/3557498277.html

Band members needed!!!! (Worcester,Mass.)

Do you want to be in a band but are unsure how to start one or don't know anyone good enough? Well we're your guys! We two teenage guys looking to further our music career. So we started a metal/metal core with some pop punk band and are in need of members. We already a screamer (Zach) and a bassist (Sean) but still need rhythm and lead guitarists, a singer, and a drummer * must be good and know how to play *must be in Worcester *guitarists must have their own guitars * if you're want to be our drummer we already have a set so no need to transport your set * must be ages 14-19 So if you're interested hit us up Text Sean at 508-635-7923 or Zach at 413-636-1413 or email at seany3tears@yahoo.com

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