Humorous or horrifying anal sex stories (male on female)[views:9135][posts:85]_________________________________ [Jun 9,2008 3:18pm - Dogbert ""] Post yours |
| _____________________________ [Jun 9,2008 3:30pm - Mess ""] i was once fucking a fat chick years ago. the dutie was done, so came the next day. we're sitting having a drink and she says "i can't believe last night" i said "yeah huh" (i was thinking she was talking about how good i banged that broad into oblivion but... that wasn't the case. she then says to me "that's the first time i've ever let anyone try anal on me". at that point, i didn't know what the fuck to say. i seriously had no fucking idea i was in her fat, looooose, fucking kaboooooose. the thing was definitely in rough shape. :bartmoon: |
| _____________________________ [Jun 9,2008 3:31pm - Yeti ""] that is a horrifying story. |
| _____________________________ [Jun 9,2008 3:32pm - Mess ""] i felt dumb for not knowing where i threw my shit. but she should feel dumberer for having the loosest asshole on the southshore. |
| ____________________________ [Jun 9,2008 3:39pm - ZJD ""] It's hard to imagine that you mistook a dry asshole for anything else. Are you sure she wasn't fucking with you? |
| ________________________________ [Jun 9,2008 3:40pm - W3 nli ""] Mess said:the loosest asshole on the southshore. is her name Erin :HAHAHA: |
| ____________________________________ [Jun 9,2008 3:41pm - corpus_NLI ""] once my best bro and college roomy was fingering a chicks dumper and he pulled out a into bean on his finger. he calmly looked at the chick and said, "i think this belongs to you." classy.. |
| ____________________________________ [Jun 9,2008 3:41pm - corpus_NLI ""] into = pinto, my b. |
| _____________________________ [Jun 9,2008 3:54pm - Mess ""] ZJD said:It's hard to imagine that you mistook a dry asshole for anything else. Are you sure she wasn't fucking with you? i was fucking her bareback. and yesssss she could have been fucking with me and double yesss yesss i was absolutely double fucking retarded fucking on all types of drugs and booze. |
| _____________________________________ [Jun 9,2008 4:24pm - the_reverend ""] ass sweat was a plus in that story |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 10,2008 2:26am - ellesarusrex ""] really drunk having sex on my parents couch heard noises nobody was coming but it was enough to make kid i was dating dead limp.. but he was too drunk to realize.. tried to stick it back in i said no the fuck way and jokingly he put it in my ass.. i def almost puked on command haha like tryign to shove one of those wormy toys into your ass.. you know the ones that keep slipping out of your hands.. ugh blegh. hahahaha i would like to meet someone whos experienced pink sock lol |
| ________________________________________ [Jun 10,2008 6:35am - brad weymouth ""] the first time fooling around with a chick, im going down on her and started tickling her butthole(we had both just showered). she seemed to enjoy the tickling, so i shoved my middle finger up her butt...all i heard was "whoa?" so i slowly extracted the finger, which was clean. i was then known as Mr Badfinger:bartmoon: |
| __________________________________ [Jun 10,2008 8:02pm - Dankill ""] Only done anal once and that was when I was 17 and the girl was this quiet mousey lil catholic school girl. It confirmed the belief that behind closed doors, even the most meek catholic school girl turned into a massive repressed whore. |
| _______________________________ [Jun 10,2008 8:25pm - Hoser ""] I had a chick peel out on the living room carpet and slam her head into the fouton. I think that she passed out for a sec, then she just started crying. |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 10,2008 8:26pm - the_reverend ""] this thread should be moar awesome. anal is awesome. if you think otherwise then your girl has a nappy stankass. tell her to wipe better and jab it in the badlands again. |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 10,2008 9:04pm - the_reverend ""] if it's not asstastic, you are doing it wrong. |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 10,2008 11:28pm - Conservationist ""] I'm an asscetic, I don't engage in karmic behaviors |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 9:14am - ellesarusrex ""] my ffriend jason told me a silly anal story yesterday ...he fucked this nasty broad and pulled out a shit covered dick.. shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitdick. ugh.. i dont get how broads can be so disgusting... another thign i dont understand is chicks that smell like dead fish. WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?? |
| _______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 9:17am - aaron_michael ""] one of the best text messages I've ever received in my life was "lose my number, delete me off myspace, my ass hasn't stopped bleeding for 8 hours" |
| ________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 9:18am - xmikex ""] vagina ftw |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 10:54am - Conservationist ""] If you don't lubricate, the walls of her rectum close in on your member. This creates a suction from within to without. Lubricate and stretch that ass, and you won't be a turdpump. |
| _______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 10:59am - ellesarusrex ""] Conservationist said:If you don't lubricate, the walls of her rectum close in on your member. This creates a suction from within to without. Lubricate and stretch that ass, and you won't be a turdpump. end result = pink sock |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 11:00am - Conservationist ""] [img] |
| _______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 11:04am - ellesarusrex ""] hahaa |
| _______________________________ [Jun 11,2008 12:43pm - Yeti ""] xmikex said:vagina ftw agreed. i don't understand the ass fetish. i mean i love a nice ass, and i do enjoy using the finger, but i'll stick with vag. it works just fine for me. |
| _______________________________ [Jun 11,2008 12:58pm - blue ""] no poophole plzkthx |
| _________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 1:11pm - Martins ""] ONLY poophole plzkthx |
| _________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 3:05pm - Conservationist ""] ONLY poophole is true!!! |
| _____________________________ [Jun 11,2008 3:06pm - mOe ""] Dont have a story for this one. Never been. |
| _________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 3:07pm - Conservationist ""] then why is the O in your name so big? haha |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 3:09pm - the_reverend ""] zing. |
| ___________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 3:12pm - starmummy ""] I stumbled upon a cream pie video online with full pink sock. I almost puked. |
| ___________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 3:14pm - starmummy ""] First time I tried anal it just wouldn't go in. Second time she let me do it and it was great......for me. I found out much later that she was actually in a lot of pain but didn't bother to tell me. I would love to try it again, but this time I'd be smart enough to use lube. That was a long time ago. |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 3:31pm - the_reverend ""] no lube! n00b mistake. girls need to learn to take it in the p00per. otherwise, what's an analversary with out it!? |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 3:32pm - Joshtruction ""] no lube heard a "I think I am bleeding" so I looked down... "thats nasty, get the fuck away from me" .... I got shit dicked. Weird because we had done it many times before with no weird stuff like that. I guess thats the worst I got. |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 5:51pm - ellesarusrex ""] ...lube is digusting. |
| __________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 5:56pm - Grizloch ""] apparently a friend of mine passed out a few weeks ago and woke up with her bung hole hurting, she confronted her boyfriend (who is practically her brother [in a totally non-biological way...] which is a whole different story), who said he lubed her up and did the deed while she slept she wasnt drunk HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!?! HOW COULD YOU NOT WAKE UP?!?! |
| _____________________________ [Jun 11,2008 6:01pm - mOe ""] some people are hard sleepers, man...and how could she have not smelled the lube...lube fuckin stinks, man |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 6:24pm - the_reverend ""] lungey lube. |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 6:55pm - ellesarusrex ""] Grizloch said:apparently a friend of mine passed out a few weeks ago and woke up with her bung hole hurting, she confronted her boyfriend (who is practically her brother [in a totally non-biological way...] which is a whole different story), who said he lubed her up and did the deed while she slept she wasnt drunk HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!?! HOW COULD YOU NOT WAKE UP?!?! when i was 19 my boyfriend did this to me.. hahaha i woke up though and cried.. |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 6:56pm - corpus DIE fuck ""] woooow. |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 6:59pm - Joshtruction ""] ellesarusrex said: Grizloch said:apparently a friend of mine passed out a few weeks ago and woke up with her bung hole hurting, she confronted her boyfriend (who is practically her brother [in a totally non-biological way...] which is a whole different story), who said he lubed her up and did the deed while she slept she wasnt drunk HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!?! HOW COULD YOU NOT WAKE UP?!?! when i was 19 my boyfriend did this to me.. hahaha i woke up though and cried.. So have you learned to like it while your awake and expecting it yet? |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 7:01pm - ellesarusrex ""] not like a champ... |
| ___________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 7:03pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] [img] |
| __________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 7:05pm - dertoxia ""] hahaha i'm still laughing!! |
| ________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 7:11pm - DestroyYouAlot ""] Bum is fun, as long as the girl knows when NOT to do it. Lube + one in the chamber = brown slip & slide. NO THANKS. |
| _________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 7:16pm - Conservationist ""] ellesarusrex said:...lube is digusting. Use olive oil, like the priests do. |
| _______________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 10:47pm - quintessence ""] [img] |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 10:53pm - SacreligionNLI ""] all-vegetable longening |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 11,2008 10:53pm - SacreligionNLI ""] *lengthening ugh...fail |