ask dave maggot questions and he will answer.[views:22475][posts:93]_____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:36pm - Dave_Maggot ""] ask me about anything. if its a straight forward question i will answer straight forward. ask ridiculous questions to see how i used to bullshit my way through essays in school. I AM THAT FUCKING BORED! |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:44pm - AUTOPSY_666 ""] Is it true that weed is completely out of your system after 6 weeks? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:45pm - Dave_Maggot ""] yes, and faster if you drink lots of water and take these gold something or other pills i cant recall the whole name for, but yes. |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:50pm - Dave_Maggot ""] golden seal maybe |
| _________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:50pm - Martins ""] It stays in your hair, so I've been told. |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:52pm - Dave_Maggot ""] i think youre thinking about lsd. but it could be weed too though. i dunno |
| _________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:52pm - Martins ""] LSD stores in your spinal cord fluid, I thought? |
| __________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:53pm - dertoxia ""] how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:56pm - AUTOPSY_666 ""] Martins said:It stays in your hair, so I've been told. [img] :D |
| ________________________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 10:58pm - whiskey_weed_and_women ""] dave should i buy a 5150 cab or a sunn cab |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:00pm - Dave_Maggot ""] a woodchuck could chuck the fuck out of all the world's natural resources if given enough p.c.p. plummeting humanity into a tail spin of carnage and cannibalism. theres one recorded case in texas 1965. one single would chuck was fed nothing but mr. t cereal. he escaped his cage, killed the entire staff including security, and half the population of france. he was put down. the only thing killing him was a tooth brush. the handle sharpened into a common prison shiv. president lincoln declared him zoodchuck: zero |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:00pm - Dave_Maggot ""] 5150 |
| _________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:04pm - Martins ""] sunn |
| _________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:04pm - Martins ""] AUTOPSY_666 said: Martins said:It stays in your hair, so I've been told. [img] :D Who is that? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:04pm - Dave_Maggot ""] ok sunn then |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:05pm - Dave_Maggot ""] she is the president of sweden |
| _________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:07pm - Martins ""] no 5150 |
| _________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:07pm - Martins ""] that bald guy is the president of sweden? |
| ________________________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:07pm - whiskey_weed_and_women ""] i should mention that the 5150 cab is 200 the sunn is 400 |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:07pm - Dave_Maggot ""] ok 5150 |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:08pm - Dave_Maggot ""] no the girl is, the bald guy is reginald p. fuddermupper, he invented the tuning fork in 1358 |
| _________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:11pm - Martins ""] the tuning fork brought humanity to its highest point in decades. |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:11pm - Dave_Maggot ""] also inventing the light switch and the gazebo. but meeting his untimely demise in 1512 whilst trying to install the first light switch within a gazebo |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:14pm - Dave_Maggot ""] it still goes down in the history books, being called 'The Great Gazebo Fire of 1982.' |
| ___________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:17pm - narkybark ""] Dave, how do they get the chocolate into M&M without breaking the coating? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:25pm - Dave_Maggot ""] they hire a small group of children with telekinetic abilities. it was a hush hush procedure until the m&m famine in 2022. then it went public. saving millions. you take this small group of gifted youngsters. make them project their rage onto a large colony of chocolate. making the chocolate and all it's villagers erupt into liquid, this liquid is then systematically herded into the pod bay doors of over sized candy shells. when sealing the core, you then take the shrinking device and aim bravely. and abracadabra. M&M'S |
| _________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:30pm - Martins ""] how is babby formed? |
| ______________________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:32pm - Stabby_McGunnakillya ""] Dave, what came first? The chicken or the egg? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:37pm - Dave_Maggot ""] babby is formed by reverse abortionz |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:38pm - Dave_Maggot ""] the chicken, but by that time the egg was dead. the chicken did 5 years, only being charged with man slaughter, the excuse of being in the heat of passion was used for defense. |
| ______________________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:39pm - Stabby_McGunnakillya ""] Actually the answer is the chicken came first, but for the reason that he had to cum to create the egg. HAH! |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 3,2009 11:44pm - Dave_Maggot ""] i hear god did the same thing |
| _______________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:08am - IllinoisEnemaBradness ""] what do you regret? |
| __________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:08am - MillenialKingdom ""] Is daylight savings time pointless? |
| ___________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:12am - DJ DEATH ""] SUNN CABS! Peavey is GAY! (and of course, sunn speakers dont omit the massive amounts of low end when over driven!) |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:13am - Dave_Maggot ""] i regret nothing really. to regret would to be focused on the past. the progression of life requires to be focused on the now. thats the straight forward answer. haha. i regret not climbing a mountain, i regret not fighting off that horde of robots that consumed parliament. i regret not time traveling to help jesus fight the vampires from dracula 2000. i regret EVERYTHING! |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:14am - Dave_Maggot ""] daylight savings time is the only way to prevent Roseanne Barr from devouring times square. fact. |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:19am - Dave_Maggot ""] im gonna go to bed. but keep em coming and i'll answer them tomorrow. |
| __________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:51am - niccolai ""] Dave, WHERE THE FUCK IS MY TV REMOTE THIS IS SERIOUSLY GETTING STUPID. |
| ________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:54am - DestroyYouAlot ""] When am I getting the check from that Nigerian guy you put me in touch with? |
| ______________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:55am - the_reverend ""] are you drunk? |
| ______________________________ [Mar 4,2009 6:18am - Pires ""] why don't you look me in the eyes anymore while we're making love? Is it because of the beard? |
| ___________________________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 7:20am - jimbo blazing + eatin before work ""] why don't you look me in the eyes while your making love to Pires anymore? |
| ________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 7:48am - W3 nli ""] why does pires have a beard? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 8:13am - SkinSandwich ""] Why do you take opiates solely for the fact it will turn your shit into concrete? |
| ________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 8:53am - darkwor ""] Why is my semen glowing fluorescent purple? |
| ________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 8:55am - W3 nli ""] Dave, why did they ruin star wars? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 9:26am - orgymf@work ""] W3%20nli said:Dave, why did they ruin star wars? it wasn't completely ruined. come on....you didn't dig episode 3? at all? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 10:46am - Dave_Maggot ""] niccolai: your remote control was stolen by werewolves. fact. they needed it to watch 'the view' this morning. destroy: checks in the mail. but it just so happens the mail truck was a transformer. he has some other stuff to tend to. so 2 weeks. rev: no sir i was not drunk then and am not drunk currently. maybe slipping into slight dementia, but no sir, not drunk. pires: cuz you've lost that loving feeling |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 10:53am - Dave_Maggot ""] jim: cuz you've got that loving feeling. but the beard is keeping us from our love. like romeo and juliet. sean: cuz theres a secret society that wants his face to be warm. i cant say why, i took an oath, but his face needs to stay warm! skin: cuz someones gotta build this road, and i need materials darkwor: you have a voodoo curse on you, papa shango did it. he just bought a black light. wants to decorate his room. but he has no money for paint sean: cuz star wars remaining good, meant that childhood was pure and innocent, and sacred. and everyone knows thats a load of bullshit. i blame double dragon. orgy: i did like episode 3 but only cuz he killed the younglings |
| ______________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 10:56am - the_reverend ""] really? |
| ________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:01am - DestroyYouAlot ""] This is hands down my new favorite thread. |
| __________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:04am - largefreakatzero ""] Dave, why (the past 2 days) have I started the day with 2 normal dumps and followed them with 2 bouts of raging diarrhea blasting from my anus? |
| ______________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:05am - Stabby_McGunnakillya ""] Dave answer this ultimate question... Why? just why? |
| ___________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:11am - FuckIsMySignature ""] WHAT... is your favorite colorrrrr????!!!! |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:16am - Dave_Maggot ""] rev: yes, really large: its the toilets plan to populate itself with a growing ecosystem, its own society if you will. you are their god planet. seasons move fast, winter into spring. in like a lion out like a lamb. a fast lamb. the toilet is sending your anus electromagnetic pulses, that make you contribute to this ecosystem. you're being manipulated. matt: if i told you, i'd have to kill you |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:17am - Dave_Maggot ""] fuck: my favorite color is blue sir |
| ________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:21am - DestroyYouAlot ""] This advice is almost Brulian in quality. |
| ______________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:25am - the_reverend ""] really?? |
| __________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:27am - largefreakatzero ""] Thank you -- just knowing the truth is calming to my sphincter. |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:35am - Dave_Maggot ""] rev: yes. . . really |
| ______________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:16pm - orgymf@work ""] Dave_Maggot said: orgy: i did like episode 3 but only cuz he killed the younglings GOD IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO AWESOME IF THEY SHOWED IT HAPPEN!!! |
| __________________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:26pm - MillenialKingdom ""] Should I go to a show tonight? |
| _________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 12:40pm - Martins ""] DestroyYouAlot said:This advice is almost Brulian in quality. Do you know why ya ice cubes taste so BOORING? It's cuz you make em out of stupid water, ya bimbo! |
| ________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 1:01pm - W3 nli ""] orgymf@work said: W3%20nli said:Dave, why did they ruin star wars? it wasn't completely ruined. come on....you didn't dig episode 3? at all? between Jaja and everyones awful acting yeah I hated all of those when I watch them again. I mean sure the first 3 are campy as fuck and there's probably better acting skills in a Friday 13th movie but those first three ruled so much more, and yeah fuck the storyline I mean it's like Lucas ran out of characters and needed to tie everyone together so perfectly it was just so horrible. |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 1:08pm - Dave_Maggot ""] you should go to a show tonight. for the mere fact that Dave Maggot does not drive, and cannot attend 90% of shows. go to make up for his show absence. have fun. live life. |
| _________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 1:19pm - ScumFuck ""] why does it burn when i pee? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 1:21pm - orgymf@work ""] W3%20nli said: orgymf@work said: W3%20nli said:Dave, why did they ruin star wars? it wasn't completely ruined. come on....you didn't dig episode 3? at all? between Jaja and everyones awful acting yeah I hated all of those when I watch them again. I mean sure the first 3 are campy as fuck and there's probably better acting skills in a Friday 13th movie but those first three ruled so much more, and yeah fuck the storyline I mean it's like Lucas ran out of characters and needed to tie everyone together so perfectly it was just so horrible. WOW it appears there is little in life we agree on |
| ________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 1:22pm - W3 nli ""] hey i gotta do something to pass the time at work. |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 1:32pm - orgymf@work ""] disagreeing with me is your passtime? now i feel special |
| _______________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 1:58pm - DestroyYouAlot ""] Martins said: DestroyYouAlot said:This advice is almost Brulian in quality. Do you know why ya ice cubes taste so BOORING? It's cuz you make em out of stupid water, ya bimbo! Put that in your milk! |
| _______________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 2:13pm - jimbo blazing ""] fuck yo milk nigga! |
| ________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 2:21pm - W3 nli ""] orgymf@work said:disagreeing with me is your passtime? now i feel special well that was just yesterday, today were friends again the marvels of the internet is at hand kids. let us rejoice and drink of guiness. |
| _______________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 2:24pm - DestroyYouAlot ""] I thought we weren't gonna talk about our guiness in public. WHAT HAPPENS IN CAMPING TRIP STAYS IN CAMPING TRIP. |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 5:09pm - Dave_Maggot ""] scum: you got it from the toilet seat. . . and from engaging in 3-way action with Boris Yeltsin and Diane Keaton. C-C-COMBO BREAKER!! |
| __________________________________ [Mar 4,2009 11:37pm - Dankill ""] What was the hardest you ever made a bitch cum? And how? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 12:30am - i_am_not_me ""] Why does the voiceover guy in those 6-Hour Power commercials say every line...like it's the last line in the commercial? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 6:38am - the_reverend ""] fail on everyone for missing my simspons refrence. |
| _____________________________ [Mar 5,2009 7:27am - Yeti ""] i thought it was a South Park reference from the truth about 9/11 episode. |
| _____________________________ [Mar 5,2009 7:28am - Yeti ""] also: what is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow? |
| _____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 7:41am - the_reverend ""] his third answer should been "yes, thabk you come again" |
| _____________________________ [Mar 5,2009 7:46am - Yeti ""] ah, the Kwik E Mart guru, gotcha. |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 1:36pm - Dave_Maggot ""] Dan: jesus christ! well. pretty hard and a few times after that too. done by oral. i'm the grand fucking champion of that shit. |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 1:39pm - Dave_Maggot ""] cuz he ingested half a minute power, and has to press a button to feed more power into his system to start a new sentence. |
| ______________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 1:51pm - aaron_michael ""] what is the thought process of the average woman? |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 2:06pm - Dave_Maggot ""] watch a clockwork orange, on rewind, on l.s.d. |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 2:07pm - Dave_Maggot ""] while suspiria plays on another tv. and the house is on fire |
| ___________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 2:09pm - W3 @ WORK ""] Dave first time caller long time listen. my question to you Dave is if you're given a 30min paid break and a 30min unpaid break shouldn't you be able to combine those breaks and just leave an hour earlier from work and should i wear these shoes with these pants I'm gonna hang up now and listen to your answers over the radio thank you |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 2:21pm - Dave_Maggot ""] i mean if theres coverage for the station and the works all taken care of, i cant see why not. and yes, you should that'd look simply FABULOUUUSS! |
| ___________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 2:23pm - W3 @ WORK ""] lol I work in an office so there's nothing cover once I'm gone shit is done till well tomorrow and yeah yeah fuck yeah awwwwwww yeah. |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 2:32pm - Dave_Maggot ""] office work is mysterious to me |
| _________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 2:57pm - ScumFuck ""] i now worship dave maggot as a deity. his wisdom is divine |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 5,2009 3:16pm - Dave_Maggot ""] just doing my job, just doing my job haha |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 18,2012 9:56am - Alx_Casket ""] Why do they only sell tobiko flakes during the christmas season? I can't find that shit anywhere, and there is NO reason why it should be considered a seasonal food. |